The Crystal Ball 2014 Season Kickoff

The best part about the beginning of the NFL season is hope. No one sucks yet, nor is anyone a runaway juggernaut. Everyone could be the next Super Bowl champion, and 32 fan bases dream, as though it were the night before Christmas, that their team is that special team.

Of course, after September, we all know better about where every team stands, but at the beginning, things are all wonderful and amazing with fans swooning over the new draft picks, new free agents, and their unblemished records. But waiting for games is interminable, so questions arise? How will my team perform? Is my coach on the hot seat? What free agents will pan out? Fans want to know how much hope they should build before Week 1.

In an attempt to raise, or lower, expectations, Fox Sports provided a nice primer for fans at the beginning of training camp to answer one vital question about each team. As they get paid for their analysis, obviously their answers are in depth and well researched. But if you ask me, these questions can be answered fast, clean without a bunch of jargon, with nothing more than the eye test given to teams. So without further ado, and major apologies to Alex Marvez and the Fox Sports staff, here is my take on their questions, and each NFL team’s chances.

1) Is this the year the Bills end the NFL’s longest playoff drought?

No. Hey this is easy.

2) Can Ryan Tannehill finally end the Marino Curse?

Again, no.

3) Is cornerback Darrelle Revis the missing piece to give Bill Belichick and Tom Brady their fourth Lombardi Trophy together?

Unless he can play cornerback AND offensive guard, no.

4) Can the New York Jets offense finally start pulling its weight?

Bwha ha ha ha ha! And no.

5) Will the real Joe Flacco please stand up?

He did last season. Oh you thought playoff Joe was real?

6) Can the Bengals finally win a playoff game after three straight seasons of postseason disappointment?

Are Mike Brown and Marvin Lewis still prominently involved? Then no.

7) How soon until Johnny Manziel becomes Cleveland’s starting quarterback?

Probably in Week 4 by a desperate coaching and marketing staff. The better question is how soon until Johnny Manziel ceases to be Cleveland’s starting quarterback, and the answer is after it’s far too late for Cleveland to recover.

8) Can holes in the Steel Curtain defense get patched?

Yes, but not all of them this season.

9) What should we expect in Bill O’Brien’s first season as head coach of the Texans?

Bad quarterback play and a lot of losing.

10) Are the Colts rugged enough to reach the Super Bowl?

As compared to whom in the AFC, because I wouldn’t classify Denver as “rugged” and they made it. Better question, are the Colts rugged enough to win the Super Bowl, and the answer is no.

11) Are the Jaguars primed to become the NFL’s most improved team?

No, but if they play Bortles they’ll have a chance.

12) What type of impact will be made by new Titans head coach Ken Whisenhunt?

Well I don’t believe he has the same burst he once had, and his 40 time is really slow. He could be a hindrance out there on the field, so my expert opinion is his impact will be limited to coaching only.

13) Are the Broncos good enough to repeat as the AFC’s Super Bowl representative?

Of course they are, them and about 8 other teams. The better question is will they repeat, and the answer is no.

14) How much will offseason player departures hurt the Chiefs?

Emotionally, I believe the team will remain resilient, but their overall performance will suffer.

15) Can the Raiders win enough games to satisfy team owner Mark Davis?

Bwha ha ha ha ha ha! AAAHHHHH ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

No.

16) Can the Chargers push Denver for AFC West supremacy?

Of course they can, even the Raiders with two well played games can push Denver. The better question is will they overtake Denver for AFC West supremacy, and the answer is of course not.

17) Will the Cowboys stop being a perennial .500 team?

Yes, they will become a sub .500 team.

18) Will a change in offensive coordinator help fix quarterback Eli Manning?

No.

19) How will the Eagles compensate for the decision to cut star wide receiver DeSean Jackson?

With lots and lots of LeSean McCoy.

20) Will quarterback Robert Griffin III get back on track in his third NFL season?

No, he plays for the Washington Snyders. And any coach worth his salt that could maximize RGIII the most would not take a job with this train wreck of a team.

21) Can the Bears win a Super Bowl with Jay Cutler at quarterback?

Of course they could. Baltimore won with Trent Dilfer, and Joe Flacco. The Giants won with Eli Manning, twice. Cutler could put together 4 good games in a row. But will he? No. And the better question is could he win with this Bears defense? And the answer is definitely not.

22) Is new coach Jim Caldwell the answer to Detroit’s problems?

Unfortunately, no.

23) Will the Packers defense regain its Super Bowl form of the 2010 season?

Nope.

24) Can the Vikings coax Brett Favre out of retirement?

Is this a question from 2 years ago? Heck no, he just mended fences in Green Bay. And more importantly, if this is a viable question, and the Vikings best option at quarterback is a 44 year old retiree several years removed from the game, there are bigger problems in Minnesota than we all realized.

25) How different will Atlanta’s defense look?

No different, they still plan to use only 11 players to stop opposing offenses.

26) How will the Panthers replace Steve Smith and Jordan Gross?

With a wide receiver and tackle, respectively.

27) How can the Saints play better away from home?

Bring signs and other paraphanalia from New Orleans with them, put them up before the game, pretend they’re at home.

28) What will Tampa Bay’s new coordinator Jeff Tedford’s offense look like?

I’m guessing 11 guys, some larger, some faster, trying to move an oblong ball into a cordoned off section of a field where they will be awarded points for breaching an imaginary plane.

29) What will it take for Arizona to break the Seattle-San Francisco stranglehold atop the NFC West?

San Francisco is working on their end, with legal issues, injuries, a questionable quarterback and an arrogant head coach working his way out of town. In Seattle’s case, salary cap issues.

30) How much will 49er quarterback Colin Kaepernick evolve as a passer?

As much as Tim Tebow.

31) How prepared are the Seahawks to defend their Super Bowl title?

As much as any team and coach who’s never done a title defense before them were prepared.

32) Is Sam Bradford a true franchise quarterback?

The world may never know.

On Tap Tonight

Thursday

Green Bay (0-0) at Seattle (0-0)

As with recent tradition, the defending Super Bowl champions will kick off the season with a home game, thus allowing the NFL and all fans to fawn over the crowned victors as they bathe in adoration from within the national spotlight. Yes, when you put it like that, it sounds amazingly egotistic. But I’m a big fan of this practice.

The defending champions should be feted a bit more. Yes, they get adulation and praise in the Super Bowl post game, and the week that follows. But once mid-February hits, most people have moved on, and by March, the only people who care are the team and its most diehard fans. Everyone else has moved on to free agency, draft watches and thinking of mini camps and training camp.

So taking a moment before the insanity of another NFL season begins to again recognize a team that scaled the NFL mountain is a great new tradition for the league. The only curious aspect of this to me is why I never see a more fierce competition from the chosen opponent. Not that bad teams are chosen to play, usually it’s a good opponent, and an intriguing matchup.

For me, I guess I just expect a higher level of angry play from the opponent. Think about it, you’re starting your season on the road, against the NFL champion, on a Thursday night, in the national spotlight with the entire NFL and football universe watching. The game increasingly is having a Super Bowl-like feel and atmosphere, yet the attention is solely one sided. Shouldn’t this just royally tick off the visiting team? Shouldn’t they just be frothing at the mouth to bring the defending champions down a peg?

It should, but since the NFL Kickoff game became a feature for the defending champions, the Super Bowl winner has had an 8-2 record. Now, those two losses came in the last two season, so is the vitriol directed at the champs catching up? Will this mean the Packers will pull off the big win? Will Seattle find out it’s much harder to defend than to win? The answers….are no, no and yes.

Seahawks over Packers

Coming Sunday, the official season kick off, with our Super Bust picks, Idiot of the off season and the first full slate of NFL picks!