The Crystal Ball 2014 Preseason Preview - NFC North

How are you enjoying training camp thus far? Jazzed about this weekend’s games? I know this is thinking far ahead, but have you considered your choices for this year’s Super Bowl half time show? I know, since when did we have a choice? Isn’t the performer what the NFL and its corporate partners want to cram down our throats?

Not if this man has anything to say about it. He’s put together a petition to get the NFL to name “Weird Al” Yankovic as the Super Bowl halftime reporter. Honestly, I could not be behind this campaign more. I love the concept, the potential for entertainment. Heck I love just the thought alone. Think about it, “Weird Al” is entertaining for the entire family, so no worries about Nipple Gate again. His songs are fun and catchy, no worries about profanity or lewdness. And considering the galaxy of stars he’s parodied over his career, the potential for amazing guest stars is through the roof.

I encourage you to sign the petition, if to only make a point to the NFL that we the sports consumer would love to have “Weird Al” over the other overblown clap trap out there. Not like Heir Goodell is likely to listen, but it’s always worthwhile to take a chance. And with that, I bring you installment four.

NFC North

Chicago Bears

2013 – Finished 8-8 2^nd in Division

The monsters of the midway managed to finish second in the division last year, which was fairly impressive until you consider how terrible overall in quality and wins the NFC North was.

But 2014 is a new season correct? That’s the fairly obvious commentary oft heard this time of year. And Chicago is no exception to trite sayings. The team continues to develop under 2^nd year head coach Marc Trestman, and the team went out and poached Jared Allen from Minnesota. Improve yourself while damaging a division rival, very sneaky Chi-Town!

Projected outcome –I see improvement in the team coming overall, including with their win loss record. Although with the team’s continued insistence that Jay Cutler is a franchise quarterback, I cannot see them overtaking the division. Second place again for da Bears, although if Jay Cutler starts doing Jay Cutler things, they’ll drop to third.

Detroit Lions

2013 – Finished 7-9 3^rd in Division

There was a bit of upheaval this off season for the Lions. The team, after another frustrating season and what seemed to be a continuance of a backslide to mediocrity ended the Jim Schwartz experiment. I cannot say I’m terribly sorry to see him go, but it would be fun to see which head coach he’d try to fake fight this year. Hold be me back boys!

In his place comes Jim Caldwell. Caldwell, fresh from success in Baltimore, will try to atone for his failures in Indianapolis by bringing some winning success to Detroit while attempting to rehabilitate the Lions’ reputation as a dirty team. Ndamukong Suh, we’re all looking in your direction. Here’s hoping Caldwell finds some success, and can spend 3 hours on Sunday’s looking slightly more animated than the Pirates of the Caribbean in Disneyland.

The team also lost owner William Clay Ford Sr., who passed away in the offseason. Born in 1925, Ford was the last surviving child of Edsel Ford, and last surviving grandchild of Henry Ford. That is amazing to think and a wonder to know the things he saw in his lifetime.

Projected outcome – As with Chicago I see improvement coming on the horizon for Detroit. I think it will take a season for Caldwell to affect some real change, but then I may be a bit conservative in my projections. Regardless, I think they remain in third place, unless the real Jay Cutler shows up, then I see the Lions in second.

Green Bay Packers

2013 – Finished 8-7-1 1^st in Division

I feel like I’ve flashed back about six years, because it seemed every time I turned around, I kept hearing….”Favre, will he or won’t he?”

No, he’s not coming back. Or is he…..

He is! Favre is coming back to the Pack! The team has been working on mending some long damaged fences with their former star, and has been considering when would be the appropriate time to invite Brett home and retire his number with the team. Jeez, he last played for Green Bay in 2007-2008 and you already want to retire his number? Way to let he honor percolate there Packers.

Anyway, the team has apparently held off thus far because they were concerned some of Packer faithful may not have forgiven Favre for ending his career in Minnesota and there might be some unfortunate booing that would occur. Favre, to his credit, has stated publicly that he isn’t worried about such nonsense. This surprises me none. I imagine Favre is digging retirement life to the point where there isn’t much that fazes the old gunslinger at all.

…..And just as an aside, really Packer faithful, there are still some of you out there that would boo? I thought Green Bay was supposed to have some of the best fans around? Come on cheese heads, Brett left, it was messy but you won a Super Bowl (grrrrr) with Aaron Rodgers and although Brett tried with Minnesota, and came close, he definitely did not. Yeah, so he played for the Vikings. Yeah from a fan perspective that sucks. But it’s all in the past. It’s time to forgive and move on. He's one of your top three Packers of all time and one of the greatest football players of all time. It’s long overdue time to welcome him home. Ok, back to regular programming….

And it turns out one of the biggest supporters and voices in the Packers organization pushing for the return of Brett has been his old protégé, Aaron Rodgers. And we thought those two never got along so well. So all this talk and machinations has finally led to the team announcing that Brett will be inducted into Green Bay’s Hall of Fame next season, and Brett will be officially welcomed back into the fold.

In other news, receiver Randall Cobb stated he hasn’t done enough to warrant a new deal from the team. Wow, talented and humble, can he test free agency, particularly a little farther east, with a team that also has a rabid, devoted fan base?

Projected outcome – Green Bay seemed to deal with more than a few unfortunate circumstances last year, and a rash of injuries. I think with a bit of luck and a bit of health, they’ll maintain their position as the king of the NFC North hill.

Minnesota

2013 – Finished 5-10 4^th in Division

Things are ugly in Minnesota. They almost need a harbor cruise party to distract from the nonsense.

Former punter Chris Kluwe leveled some very disturbing charges at the Vikings coaching staff, charges of homophobia and a hostile work environment. Kluwe, an outspoken advocate for gay rights and many other social causes, also claimed the team released him not due to poor performance, but because they did not like him speaking his mind and speaking out on contemporary issues.

The Vikings, predictably, claimed this to not be the case and to vigorously investigate the situation and release the findings. And investigate they did. And they released a partial report of the findings, which showed special team’s coach Mike Priefer, the main culprit behind the homophobic remarks and currently still employed by the team, said like one thing and that was totally wrong and he’s like totally sorry now bro.

Kluwe, who is apparently no angel when it comes to sophomoric locker room behavior and damaging hurtful language, felt this response by the Vikings is not good enough and plans a lawsuit against the team. I hope he does, and I hope he includes the NFL in the suit. If the league truly cares about inclusion and creating an open and inviting environment for gay players and fans, and I question they do considering how much they appear to care about women, then they should have stepped in with their own investigation and “Goodell-style” justice.

Good luck new head coach Mike Zimmer.

Projected outcome –Please, this team is in turmoil, I have no idea who the starting quarterback is, and Zimmer is a great guy but a career defensive coordinator finally getting his big shot at the top job. Ask Dick LeBeau how that worked out for him in Cincinnati. Last place, again.