The Crystal Ball 2013 Week 15

Snowmageddon strikes the NFL! Boy is the Super Bowl going to be fun if it looks like this. How frightened do you think the NFL is at the prospect of 2 feet of snow on February 2nd?

Opening Kickoff

As the temperature falls, the snow flies and the holidays approach, excitement fills the air for time with family and friends, the exchange of gifts, meals and communion with loved ones and the warmth of a special time of year. But I have a feeling those in Denver now feel a bit of trepidation, thinking of the playoffs after Thursday night. Does Peyton still feel those who question his abilities to play in the cold and snow can go shove it?

The Way It Was

Alright, so Cincinnati didn't revert to the Bungles. But they will, oh they will. Hopefully today.

Way to go Matt Flynn! it's 2011 all over again! Well. maybe not so much.

Congratulations to Denver kicker Matt Prater who set a new NFL record with a 64 yard field goal! Will it take 40 years to break this record?

Adrian Peterson ripped the Baltimore Ravens and their fans for their poor behavior during the Vikings/Ravens snoozefest/manic last 2 minutes.. Adrian, I've been saying for years they're all scumbags, I'm sorry you had to see it for yourself.

It's becoming a weekly happenstance. Jeff Triplette screwed up again, this time awarding a touchdown that did not happen. I think if Triplette keeps it up, Boomer Esiason is going to blow a fuse.

Rob Gronkowski got torn up, wrecking his knee and ending his season. Man, he is good, but he's as fragile as a Faberge egg.

Bernard Pollard laid out Wes Welker, concussing the receiver. Man, Pollard just does not like Patriots, even if they no longer play for New England.

The Steel Pit

Steelers 28 - Dolphins 34

Charles Clay spent the afternoon playing in the snow and making the Pittsburgh defense look foolish. The worst came in the fourth quarter when both Polamalu and Allen attempted to tackle him, and Clay just wormed out of their arm tackles and attempts at the ball and trotted into the end zone. But it wasn't just Clay that was too much for Pittsburgh, so was Mike Tomlin, who again mangled his time outs and end of game clock management so badly I swear I saw Andy Reid on the Steelers sidelines. But no matter anymore.

With this loss, finally everyone else has caught up with what I've said for weeks now, there goes the season. And thank goodness! Let's get to next year! In that vein, here are my suggestions of what the team should do, and what it actually will do. Members of Steelers Nation, you will not like my suggestions. You'll like what the Steelers will do even less.

My Suggestions:

Say goodbye to:

LaMarr Woodley - He's over 30, he breaks down for significant portions of every season, when he is on the field he is average at best (and has been since he got a massive contract a few years ago), he does not take his study or conditioning seriously and spends most of his time blasting radio hosts that question him or the team. In short, he's a terrible Steeler. Yes, cutting him would cost big time against the cap, but it has to happen and sooner is better than later.

Emmanuel Sanders - Considering he's a giant distraction and drops every significant pass thrown his way, I'm still wondering why we paid so much to keep him from landing in New England.

Ryan Clark - He's old, slow, and far more about promoting Ryan Clark than football. Plus, his attitude is piss poor anymore, matching his play.

Maurkice Pouncey - He's brittle, a loudmouth, an expensive distraction, and to be honest does not seem to get the Steeler way. Not only that, Fernando Velasco showed that Pouncey really isn't bringing something irreplaceable to the interior of the offensive line. Plus, I have concerns he may be involved in the Hernandez mess in some way like his brother.

Ike Taylor - Look, I love Ike as much as anyone, but he's done. When you get flamed by the browns in garbage time, it's because you lost a step. and Ike is not a wily veteran that can rely on outwitting opponents. The team made the wrong choice last year by keeping Taylor and letting Keenan Lewis go. Don't compound it by keeping Ike around longer.

Brett Keisel and Troy Polamalu - These will hurt, but are necessary. Keisel has now hit Aaron Smith territory. The talent is still there, the drive and fire is there, but his body is starting to betray him. The team will have to do with Brett as they did with Aaron, make the choice for him. As for Troy, I can make an argument for him staying, but it would have to be at a discounted price. He may have 1-2 seasons left. But unless it's at a lower rate, It would be better to let him go too early than too late (see Taylor, Ike).

The Coaching Staff - Dick LeBeau is a treasure, but it might be time for some fresh ideas. I do not wish him ill, but it's hard for anyone to see its time to move on. I think that may be the case here. Todd Haley sucks and needs to go. Period. And if Mike Tomlin is too stupid or too arrogant to realize this season is wasted and the best thing right now is to use the last three games to find out if the young guys are ready and can possibly contribute or star for the 2014 Pittsburgh Steelers, then he should not be allowed to be responsible for the direction of an NFL franchise.

Art Rooney II - Ok, I'm not saying he should leave the team. He owns it, that won't happen. But he is far too hands on with the football operations than his father ever was. In a frightening way, he seems to be approaching Jerry Jones meddling levels. Art II needs to learn a lesson from his father. Hire good people to build, train, coach and lead the team on the field, and let them do their jobs unencumbered. This lesson alone would change a great many things going wrong right now, as the team seems to operate like a kitchen with too many dissenting chefs in charge.

Say hello to:

Cam Heyward - He gets it, and even better, his play is getting it. A rightful successor to Aaron Smith.

Jason Worilds -  Talk about someone who took longer to develop than originally thought. It turns out he was just playing the wrong side. Thank goodness we figured that out before he got away like Keenan Lewis.

Shamarko Thomas - I've been saying this since early in the season. Sit Clark and let's see what Thomas can do full time.

Jarvis Jones - Same here. Rather than have Woodley's fat ass move to the right side to play poorly, give this kid a chance. Combine his speed with Worilds on the other side and we might have something.

Landry Jones - Do I think he's better than Roethlisberger? God no. But let's save Big Ben from further punishment and see if Jones can be competent enough to sucker some desperate franchise into a trade.

Mike Adams - Last chance, but we have to know. Maybe he'll be like DeCastro and get it. A boy can hope. If not, well at least we'll know.

Markus Wheaton - Do you know anything about this kid? Me either. Promote him to number 2 receiver the rest of the way. Let's find out together.

Steelers Reality:

Very little of this will happen. Maybe one or two players will go, but most will stay for either nostalgia or a false expectation that this was just a "down" year. Instead Art II will continue to meddle, and most likely make the same mistake with Worilds he did with Lewis because of money, thus setting back the team even further. As a whole they will sit on their younger players, in deference to the experienced veterans, who have led the team to a scintillating 5-8 record. The defense will continue to age and be increasingly ineffective. And Haley will continue to flounder while the offense continues to be stale and predictable and for yet another year, the prime of Ben Roethlisberger's franchise quarterback career will be wasted. Well, until his contract expires and he escapes, for which no one here would blame him.

It feels like 1998 all over again. Here's hoping we draft the next Hines Ward next year.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

Poor Vernon Davis. A few weeks ago he was tackled by his "manhood". Being pulled down by your hair is one thing, but like this? Yikes.

In that vein, no pun intended, newest Steeler Cody Wallace got a bit inappropriately handsy going for a loose ball. When players say anything can happen at the bottom of those piles, they are not kidding.

Apparently, San Diego fans are not over 2004, with this mocking of Eli Manning.

Cowboys owner Jerry Jones supports his defensive coordinator Monte Kiffin, who's defense came within 10 yards of giving up 500 yards of offense to a 5th team this season. Yeah, Kiffin's fired.

A study revealed that hits to the head are still prevalent in the NFL. How is that possible with all of Roger Goodell's focus on safety???

Here's a link showing CBS analyst Bill Cowher enjoying himself at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. Tell me, does that look like the face of a man who is interested in any way of dealing with the aggravation of coaching an NFL team? I didn't think so either.

Andre Johnson played Santa Claus this week at his annual toy giveaway. I love it when good people do good things.

Will Jim Harbaugh leave the NFL for Texas? There's probably more money and power in college football, and he can go back to being a mini tyrant and get away with it.

Seahawks quarterback, and all around athlete, Russell Wilson was drafted by the Texas Rangers in baseball's Rule 5 draft. Jeez Mariners, you couldn't jump on this at least ceremoniously?

Upon Further Review

Boy is Washington falling apart faster than cashmere in a washing machine. First it comes out that genius in charge Mike Shanahan had prepared himself to be fired by the end of last season, even going so far as to clean out his office. Well, turns out he was wrong, and with a nice playoff run the coach and team prepared for a more successful 2013 with a hopefully healed RGIII.

That, obviously did not happen. But in the wake of this year's disaster, the dirty laundry is airing out in public. It would seem Shanahan and team megalomaniac Daniel Snyder do not get along well, and have very different ideas of how to handle their star attraction RGIII. Snyder and the quarterback are tight, and Snyder's relationship with Griffin often circumvents what Shanahan in his "infinite" wisdom feels is best for the team.

The strained relationship between coach and owner seems to be reaching critical mass, with it appearing that Shanahan may be on his way out. But a battle of wills is ensuing, as if Shanahan quits, he loses the rest of his bloated contract. But if he gets fired, he'll get paid in full, something Snyder does not want.

Shanahan, in what appears to me a move to goad Snyder into firing him, has benched RGIII for the remainder of the season, obstently to let the young quarterback heal from last season's knee injury that limited him all of 2013. While that move should have been done weeks ago, unfortunately it would appear Shanahan is not doing it as what's best for the team or Griffin, but Shanahan.

The best part is that not only did the Griffin benching tick off the owner and fans, but it ticked off the team's offensive coordinator, Kyle "Son of Mike" Shanahan. Kyle feels the move is not the best for the team, and if it was Mike would have consulted the offensive coordinator before making the move.

Owner fighting coach, coach fighting quarterback, father fighting son, team in distress and losing and fans frustrations boiling over. The Washington Snyders, NFL franchise with off the field drama provided by Vince McMahon and World Wrestling Entertainment.

He Said He Said

"They've got the worst fans in the NFL. It was a bad feeling, a bad feeling." - Vikings running back Adrian Peterson on Baltimore Ravens fans who were pelting visiting Minnesota with snowballs during the game

I'VE BEEN SAYING THIS FOR YEARS! I feel so validated!

"We didn't project it to be this way. We expected to blow them out, but they got the benefit of a few calls tonight throughout the game and that helps you, especially on third down. We will see them again, and it will be a different result." - Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman

Richard, a good team overcomes bad calls. Be a man and accept defeat.

“I think it worked out pretty good.” - Steelers linebacker LaMarr Woodley assessing his own performance on the right side of the defense that netted a total of 1 solo tackle, two assisted tackles and 0 quarterback pressures, hits or sacks

See, this illustrates my point. I do not want a player on my team, claiming to be a Steeler, who is satisfied with such a poor performance. He needs to go because that attitude is infecting the entire team.

“The last straw was losing. We’ve got a lot better talent than Jacksonville, and to have them beat us twice, that’s not acceptable to us. If they’re better than we are, fine. But we didn’t play smart.” - Texans owner Bob McNair on firing head coach Gary Kubiak

I wonder if McNair would have fired Kubiak earlier if the coach had not suffered his mini stroke.

“I’m gonna be honest with you. You look like a succulent baby lamb.” - anchorman Ron Burgundy interviewing Peyton Manning

I'm excited about the movie, but I'm fearful with all the build up it's gonna suck. Oh please don't let it suck.

“You will be allowed to have food in your car and have drink in your car. And provided you’re in the boundaries of a single parking space, you’ll be able to eat or drink right next to your car. However, you’re not going to be able take out a lounge chair, you’re not going to be able to take out a grill, and you’re not going to be able to take up more than one parking space. And it’ll all be watched very carefully.” - Al Kelly on the restrictions to tailgating that will be implemented for Super Bowl XLVIII in the Meadowlands

Wow, sounds like this year's Super Bowl is going to be the opposite of fun.

Idiot of the Week

This week, on this is going to hurt. This week the idiot is me!

Yes, yours truly is this week's idiot. Why you ask? Because I was dumb enough to pick Dallas, who is terrible in December, on the road, in Chicago, on the same night the Bears were retiring the number of Iron Mike Ditka! Even if the game was during the day in September, there is no way the Bears were going to lose on Mike Ditka night!

In retrospect, the pick was so stupid, I had no choice but to point the finger of accusation at the man in the mirror.

I am an idiot.

On Tap This Week

I swear, the closer to Christmas we get, the more excited I get, the less focused I become.

Last week: 9-6

Thursday: 0-1

Season to Date: 130-79

Sure, that's not a bad week. But the week's winner was 4 points higher! Maybe this week I'll pull it together. Then again, I may watch A Christmas Story and National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation back to back.

Sunday

Philadelphia (8-5) at Minnesota (3-9-1)

Watch Napoleon Dynamite claim the division! As for Minnesota, no Peterson, no Gerhart, no chance.

Eagles over Vikings

New England (10-3) at Miami (7-6)

Now, watch what a good team does to this joke that calls themselves the Dolphins.

Patriots over Dolphins

Chicago (7-6) at Cleveland (4-9)

I'm not sold on the Bears this season, but come on, it's Cleveland.

Bears over Browns

Houston (2-11) at Indianapolis (8-5)

Well, maybe the next phase of the Houston Texans will be more successful. Keep striving for that overall number one pick, boys.

Colts over Texans

Washington (3-10) at Atlanta (3-10)

Washington has named Kirk Cousins their starter at quarterback. See Mike Tomlin, even the lowly Washington Snyders are looking at backups to assess what they have. Take a lesson.

Falcons over Snyders

Buffalo (4-9) at Jacksonville (4-9)

The winner loses draft position. Who knows what's the best way to go here.

Jaguars over Bills

San Francisco (11-2) at Tampa Bay (4-9)

It's the battle of the arrogant egomaniacal head coaches! At least Harbaugh has some success to back up his behavior.

49ers over Buccaneers

Seattle (11-2) at New York Giants (5-8)

I'm betting Seattle scores more than 14 points this week.

Seahawks over Giants

Kansas City (10-3) at Oakland (4-9)

Good offensive output by KC last week. If they can keep that up, they may win the division yet.

Chiefs over Raiders

New York Jets (6-7) at Carolina (9-4)

You think Carolina was upset with losing to New Orleans last week? Me too. You think the Jets will pay for that? Me too.

Panthers over Jets

New Orleans (10-3) at St. Louis (5-8)

Sean Payton with another playoff tune-up. I do believe he wants badly to be on stage with Goodell on February 2nd. Very badly.

Saints over Rams

Green Bay (6-6-1) at Dallas (7-6)

I don't feel good about Dallas, for obvious reasons. But I feel worse about Green Bay on the road with either Aaron Rodgers on the bench or gimpy in his first game back.

Cowboys over Packers

Arizona (8-5) at Tennessee (5-8)

We're getting closer to Carson Palmer's triumphant return to the playoffs! Exciting I know!

Cardinals over Titans

Cincinnati (9-4) at Pittsburgh (5-8)

Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin stated the team's approach would not change in the wake of the team's 8th loss. It has to change. You have to start preparing for 2014 now. And that means knowing what kind of players you have on your depth chart. Which means they must play. Tomlin's first job must be to assess talent for next year over the remaining 3 games. Winning is secondary, at best. And honestly, its detrimental to 2014. The more you win, the worse your draft position will be. If the team wins out and go 8-8, you just screw yourself in April. I hope Tomlin wakes up and realizes this. Regardless of what I just said...(sorry, it's a sickness)

Steelers over Bungles

Monday

Baltimore (7-6) at Detroit (7-6)

I still cannot figure out how a team as crappy as Baltimore is 7-6. I'm counting on Detroit to expose that questionable defense once and for all.

Lions over Ravens