The Crystal Ball 2013 Week 4

The NFL released a list of the all time toughest players. Boy there’s a lot of Steelers on this list. I wonder if any of them are busy this fall….

Opening Kickoff

Color me a big Austen Lane fan. His first hand NFL experiences and writing style really draw you into his articles and make you root for him. Personally I hope it’s my team giving him a tryout! While I tend to feel The MMQB was born to satiate Peter King’s ego (I want my own website just like Bill Simmons!), one of the best parts is that the site does provide a forum for great stories like this that get washed away in the flood of NFL news. Come on King, time to up the ante. 

Where’s my regular Chris Kluwe column?

The Way It Was

Line up members of the 0-3 club. I’m talking to you Steelers, Giants, Snyders, Jaguars, Vikings and Buccaneers. At least we’re not alone on this boat of ineptitude. Hey, this could be fun!

But seriously, 38-0 New York? At least the other 0-3 clubs showed some fight. What the heck was that?

See, what did I, and everyone else, say? Cleveland would fall apart without Trent Richa….wait what? They won?? In Minnesota??? Ummm….Well, maybe Trent Richardson was the problem. Or Brandon Weeden. Either way, I'm now officially scared to play Cleveland.

Hmmm, maybe the Seattle hangover did affect 49ers. At least for one week. Thanks a bunch, Rams.

Things got kinda bad for the 49ers when star running back ripped into head coach Jim Harbaugh in frustration during the Colts debacle. I agree with Gore, he should have the ball more. If Harbaugh was smart and gave Gore the ball more in February, they all might be wearing Super Bowl rings. But I digress.

You know what the problem with Colin Kaepernick is? It’s not that defenses have figured him out, although they have, it’s this new beard. It’s weighing him down. He needs to shave to be sleek, fast and be able to flash that winning smile. Come on Colin, pick up a razor for your team’s sake!

I knew there was more to the Von Miller story than what was being publicized, and I was right. It turns out Miller tried to cheat on his drug test. See, this is the kind of distraction that could come back to haunt a presumptive Super Bowl team at the wrong time.

Jets rookie Sheldon Richardson celebrated too soon, allowing Bills running back Fred Jackson to tear past him for a huge game. It is unconfirmed that Jackson shouted “Bazinga” as he sped past Richardson.

Speaking of the Jets, they had 18 accepted penalties against them in this game. I’d blast them for sloppy play, but I think I need to focus on Buffalo. Hey, Bills, your opponent had 18 penalties. How did you lose?

A frustrated Aaron Rodgers went at it with head coach Mike McCarthy on Sunday. Seems there is a trend of talented, franchise quarterbacks blowing up at their coach recently. Ph please let Big Ben's blowup on Haley be imminent, please let it be imminent, please let it be imminent….

And finally, Cardinals safety Rashad Johnson took is gloves off after the game to find that part of his finger stayed in one of them! The tip of his finger was severed during a punt return, and Johnson just played the remainder of the game in pain, not knowing the severity of the injury. Johnson wins for manliest player of the week, hands down and fingers off!

The Steel Pit

Steelers 23 - Bears 40

I have only 4 comments on the game.

1)   I certainly hope that when Chicago's defense was on the field, the Steeler defense paid attention. 5 turnovers forced, two of which were immediately returned for touchdowns. THAT is what a good defense does, and what this defense used to do.

2)   I hope the Steeler offense was paying attention to Chicago’s offensive unit. Efficient, devastating, and they protected their quarterback. Yeesh.

3)  Either Ben has lost his depth perception or his receivers have no idea where their routes should lead. Man was he over and under throwing everyone. And on that note, come on Big Douche, you can hold onto the ball better than that. Although I must say, Roethlisberger does a mean Eli Manning impression.

4)   3^rd and 10 Cutler scrambles for a first down? Really defense?

In other Steeler news, the team departed this week for jolly ol’ London, where they will take on the Minnesota Vikings in the first of two games to be staged this season in England. I know Roger Goodell is desperately trying to hard sell England and Europe on NFL football, and I applaud his tenacity to make a buck. But if he’s ever going to get soccer loving fans to adopt American football, he’s got to send over better representatives than this.

This tidbit crossed my eyes this week. Of the 41 NFL seasons that have come and gone since the Immaculate Reception, only 7 have been losing seasons for the Pittsburgh Steelers. Wow. And when I think about it, 8 have lead to Super Bowl appearances, with 6 culminating in wins. So yes, I need to, what’s the word, find a bit of perspective. Losing happens. Luckily, not often for the Steelers.

And finally, have you heard the life story of new Steelers punter Zoltan Mesko? It’s amazing. He started off life as a small child in war torn Romania. His family managed to escape to America only to end up in Cleveland, not unlike a war torn area. His only glimmer of hope in life was Pittsburgh, a city enveloped in hills much like his dreams of America, and their football team the Steelers. Eventually, he achieved the dream of many, and made it to the NFL, but it was to play for the evil Patriots, who chucked him like last weeks bagels when they were done with him. Finally, finally he lands with the team he grew up rooting for, the Pittsburgh Steelers and moves to his childhood utopia, Pittsburgh. He comes to his dream city at the same time when the name Zoltan is so meaningful to the next door neighbor Pittsburgh Pirates. If anyone can handle the adversity in a losing season, and see the potential for a brighter tomorrow, it’s this cat.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

Wembley Stadium has decided that they want an NFL team and they want to host a Super Bowl. Considering the tepid reaction to this week’s game, perhaps stadium illuminati may want to make a firm decision AFTER they see this week’s product.

Former Washington Snyder Fred Smoot blasted the team, calling RGIII a brat and questioning head coach Mike Shanahan, referring to him as “red lobster”. That’s too funny, I can’t top that. Moving on…

Violence is the word of the day around the NFL. Former Eagle Hugh Douglas was arrested for assaulting a woman. Douglas seemed rather unconcerned the evening following his arrest. A class act right there.

In San Francisco, fan violence at games is occurring, and appears to be a regular occurrence and growing concern. I’m all for getting in a big lather regarding your team’s rivals, but there needs to be a line between healthy expression of dislike and violence. Oh, there’s the line. It’s called less alcohol at games.

Those left a bad taste in my mouth. I need something to cheer me up. Wait, hold on, what’s this…

Recuperating Ravens receiver Jacoby Jones got into an incident last weekend on a party bus which culminated in, according to some reports, Jones being clocked on the head by a champagne bottle wielded by a stripper named Sweet Pea. 

So Greg Schiano decided to bench quarterback Josh Freeman this week in favor of an untested rookie, one week BEFORE the team's bye week and on the same weekend that the Buccaneer game tickets feature Freeman. I said it before, and someone else thinks so too. Schiano is working his way toward the unemployment line.

The gentleman who streaked a Browns preseason game has been punished, with his penance including a fine, forced to clean up after Browns games and a permanent ban from all Browns games. Wait, I thought this was a punishment.

Upon Further Review

Falcons receiver Roddy White took offense to the ESPN crew and their commentary regarding his troubled friend Aldon Smith. White in an attempt to defend Smith took to social media and proceeded to get into a Twitter war, I can’t believe I just typed those two words together, with Cris Carter. 

White’s defense of Smith boiled down to shameful finger pointing, claiming it was wrong for Carter and Keyshawn Johnson to judge Smith as everyone has driven drunk, including them. Putting aside the tremendous ignorance and dangerousness of that defense, White made himself look even stupider as he was unaware of Carter’s history of substance abuse and addiction. Carter then proceeded to school White, who eventually apologized to the retired receiver. 

White's actions shed light on one of the many issues that arise with social media. Through social media outlets, anyone is free to share their opinions, thoughts, insults and complaints to the world instantaneously regardless of facts, a full story, a well thought out commentary or the slightest bit of concern regarding the impact of their words, who they may hurt or what they might ultimately mean. Commentary and conversation through social media is becoming flippant and unintentionally derogatory, and I believe it's because we have no human being filter. 

The human being filter comes with actual social contact, between humans in a social setting. When you see another person in front of you, you remember they have thoughts, feelings, family and friends just like you do. You remember they have opinions, likes, dislikes and causes that are important to them, much like yours are to you. And ultimately, you remember that how you want to be treated by others, and proceed to treat this human in front of you in like fashion. When we find ourselves face to face with actual people, we remember to engage and utilize compassion and empathy.

But when you are disconnected from human contact, that vital piece of the human experience disappears. On social media, it’s just words on a screen. The human connection to those words loses its meaning.

White forgot that, or it never registered to him. So when he blasted Johnson and Carter, thinking he was sticking up for his friend, he also struck a nerve with Carter who knows a lot more about addiction and substance abuse problems from his own experiences than White.

If White and Carter had been discussing this face to face, it may have been a different conversation, but it happened over social media. Increasingly, without a human being right in front of you, people are losing the good sense they once had to pause first and question how their words will impact the person with whom they are speaking.

White has every right to stick up for his friend, but he should have thought first how he did it, and listened to the words and advice Carter, who has lived addiction, was trying to put forth to Smith. Like everything in life, it’s not always what you say or do, but how you say or do them where trouble lies.

He Said He Said

"We can't, I can't, turn the ball over, plain and simple." – Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger 

 Well duh.

“No. I think they were good plays. I looked at them. I watched them again. They're going to happen. I've just to make sure I hold onto it.” – Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger on potentially changing his own stance toward ball security after turning the ball over 5 times

Wait, I thought you said you can’t turn the ball over. How is not changing your approach going to fix that? He’s as thick headed as Tomlin.

"That's what we do, we take the ball away," Peppers said. "We stress it in practice every day, and it carries over to the game. We have to continue to do that on a weekly basis to continue to win, and I believe we'll be able to do that." – Bears defensive end Julius Peppers

Wait, slow down Julius, I’m taking notes. …on a weekly basis…This is good stuff.

“We’ve got great players here too. It’s so week to week in this league. You just never know. But we’ve got enough good players to play with anyone.’’ – Bengals head coach Marvin Lewis after his team defeated the favored, and much ballyhooed, Packers

Slow your roll there Marvin. Win a playoff game, then we can discuss this “great player” classification you’re using so freely.

“Aldon Smith was arrested at 7 a.m., one hour AFTER Kaepernick starts work.” - Tim Kawakami of the San Jose Mercury News

Wow, that Colin, so dedicated. Big whoop Tim, lots of people go to work at 6 a.m. You’re either trying to show Colin’s a hard worker, which if you are you’re showing up hard working people who start at the crack of dawn every day, or you’re trying to make a joke about Smith’s condition at an early time of day, which is disrespectful of the gravity of the situation and not funny. So which is it funny man?

“This is insanity … Embarrassing. I’ve never seen a Giants’ offensive line so bad.” - Former Giants linebacker Carl Banks

Good thing he wasn’t watching the Steelers game too. *Shudder*

“I believe the safest pick in the draft, beyond Andrew Luck and Robert Griffin III, is Alabama running back Trent Richardson. He’s a blue-chip player and has all the skills to quickly establish himself as a top-five player at his position. Forget the nonsense about not taking backs early; everyone would love the chance to get this guy.” – Browns general manager Mike Lombardi, writing on NFL.com on April 23, 2012, three days before Richardson was drafted by the Browns.

Ok, then why did you trade him two games into the season Mike? Is there something you’re not telling us?

"All summer long we heard, 'Week One, Week One, I'm all in. I'm going to be back.' So the pressure is on the young man to put himself back on to the football field. The adults in the room have got to stand up. I don't think Coach Shanahan, Dan Snyder or Dr. James Andrews have handled this perfectly. They screwed it up at the end of last year in the playoff game. He shouldn't have played against Seattle, and also here." - NFL Today analyst Boomer Esiason on RGIII's recovery

The further away we get from Denver's back to back Super Bowl wins, the more we realize how it was far more Elway and Davis and a lot less Shanahan that made that magic happen.

"I played with a guy in John Elway who was every bit of Tom Brady's equal in his prime, and he never disrespected me and showed that kind of outward emotion even when I ran the wrong route and missed blocks and got sacked. There is a right and wrong way to handle everything. And that is clearly the wrong way." - NFL Today analyst Shannon Sharpe on Patriots quarterback Tom Brady

"I thought that Tom Brady's behavior was deplorable. If he didn't have three Super Bowl rings and wasn't a future first-ballot Hall of Famer, none of us would feel comfortable with what we saw." - ESPN analyst Tom Jackson on Brady

What, you guys are just now figuring out Brady's a colossal tool bag? I've been pointing that out for years.

Idiot of the Week

This week’s idiot are the obvious, 49ers head coach Jim Harbaugh and team president Ted York. York and Harbaugh erred on the side of douchebaggery when instead of immediately seeking help for their troubled defensive star, or possibly punishing him to show him his self destructive behavior will enact consequences to his livelihood, they just sobered the kid up, and put him into Sunday’s game and then afterward figured out about getting the kid treatment.

York, Harbaugh and the 49ers organization have been rightfully, and thoroughly, raked over the coals for this one. But one quote stood out to me, from Ted York.

“Sitting somebody down and paying them to sit down when they’re going to seek treatment in the future, that didn’t seem like an appropriate punishment.”

Then what is appropriate punishment Ted? A massage and back rub with a firm scolding afterwards? A literal slap on the wrist while eliciting a pinky swear to never do it again? Smith has problems that need to be dealt with before he hurts himself or someone else. Allowing him to play only reinforces his bad behavior.

But hey, one game isn’t gonna hurt, now is it? Sure, don't worry about the message it sends to the public about your lackadaisical stance on drinking and driving, or how you feel about public safety, or even about the well being and mental health of a troubled young man who has obvious substance abuse issues. As long there are football games to win, all hands on deck, no matter if they’re shaking from the DTs.

I thought it when they traded away Alex Smith and I think it again now. Idiots.

On Tap This Week

Well, here we are, Week 4. Now for the next week we get to hear one of my least favorite phrases, the quarter pole. As in “let’s get to the predictions and team analysis at the quarter pole of the season”. This is football people, not horse racing. And these are not horses, they are men, playing a children’s game for lots of money while wearing plastic helmets and pads, and painting their faces and wearing bright colors and jumping up and down. Please show the proper decorum and respect.

Last week: 6-9

Thursday: 0-1

Season to Date: 30-19

See, I blew it last week, and then in an effort to fix the problem, I over corrected and got too cute on Thursday and just exasperated the losing. Some weeks, man, some weeks.

Sitting at home, wondering why they have a week off before October hits: Carolina, Green Bay

Sunday

Baltimore (2-1) at Buffalo (1-2)

I really want to take Buffalo, especially since I do dig EJ Manual, I just want to see the team finally improve, and I need someone to stick it to the wildly overrated Ravens. But I don't think the boys from Buffalo are quite ready yet.

Ravens over Bills

Cincinnati (2-1) at Cleveland (1-2)

I liked Cincinnati coming back from 16 points down to pull off a win against a good Packers team, of course that's tempered by them giving up 30 points go get behind. If Cleveland pulls this off, I will officially believe in the Brian Hoyer era. But not yet.

Bengals over Browns

Chicago (3-0) at Detroit (2-1)

Yeah, Chicago's defense is something else. But Pittsburgh did lend them an assist or 5. I still don't trust Detroit, especially now that they lost Nate Burleson to a violent pizza box collision. But I think Chicago is due to screw up.

Lions over Bears

Seattle (3-0) at Houston (2-1)

Until they show me different, I'm going with Seattle from here on out no matter who or where they play. That defense is wicked.

Seahawks over Texans

Indianapolis (2-1) at Jacksonville (0-3)

Desperate for fans to fill the stadium, Jacksonville team officials are now offering two free beers with the purchase of a ticket over a certain price point. One, it's gonna take more than 2 free beers. Two, you might as well open it to all tickets. And three, how is this a better promotion to bring in the fans than signing Tebow?

Colts over Jaguars

New York Giants (0-3) at Kansas City (3-0)

Yeah, I smell trap game too. But New York's offensive line is the only one in the league worse than Pittsburgh's, so you know it stinks. And last week the team just gave up in Carolina. So I'm gonna go with Papa Andy's gang again.

Chiefs over Giants

Pittsburgh (0-3) “at” Minnesota (0-3)

London baby! Minnesota will start Matt Cassel at quarterback over Christian Ponder, who is suffering from fractured ribs. The team doesn't want Ponder to take a hit. I don't know what the problem is, if Minnesota watched any Pittsburgh game this year, they should know the Steeler defense never touches the opposing quarterback. (cue drum rim shot)

I wonder, if during the post game handshakes, if Matt Cassel will lean into Ben Roethlisberger and just whisper in his hear, I'm so sorry I know what you're going through. I bet he does.

Steelers over Vikings

Arizona (1-2) at Tampa Bay (0-3)

Let's see, Tampa Bay will start a rookie quarterback, the team is close to open mutiny against their head coach and their season is slipping away. Bruce Arians lucked into just the right time to take a road trip to Tampa.

Cardinals over Buccaneers

New York Jets (2-1) at Tennessee (2-1)

Apparently, the Jets use pushups as motivation to avoid penalties. If someone makes a mistake, everyone else must pay for it with push ups. First off, I bet there were a ton of push ups on Monday morning last week. And secondly, this sounds just like Gomer Pyle eating the donut in Full Metal Jacket. While it lead to motivation, it ended very poorly for the drill sergeant. You might wanna rethink this methodology, Rex.

Titans over Jets

Philadelphia (1-2) at Denver (3-0)

See Seahawks entry and replace the word Seattle with Denver with this caveat. I stop picking Denver in Week 15-17 and for all playoff rounds. Oh come on, you know Peyton's track record too.

Broncos over Eagles

Washington (0-3) at Oakland (1-2)

Washington looks like a hot mess, but Oakland may be under fire for not properly treating their young quarterback for a concussion, and may even be without is services. This is the Red Lobster's best chance to nab the first win of the season.

Snyders over Raiders

Dallas (2-1) at San Diego (1-2)

Honestly, I have no good reason for this pick. Neither team thrills me, and I don't feel either is dominant. Dallas only leads the NFC East by default. Call it home field advantage I guess.

Chargers over Cowboys

New England (3-0) at Atlanta (1-2)

You thought Tom Brady flipped out at his inferior receiving corps before, just wait until after this game. I bet even Giselle gets involved.

Falcons over Patriots

Monday

Miami (3-0) at New Orleans (3-0)

Wow, color ESPN lucky getting a match up of undefeated teams. Watch, it'll be a low scoring snoozefest.

Saints over Dolphins