The Crystal Ball 2012 Week 17

Ok, I know what you're thinking, "Oh come on another short week? He's just hiding from Pittsburgh's horrible season now."

Honestly, yes I did that on Monday and Tuesday. Heck if I had known Pittsburgh's season was going to crater the Heinz Field turf like the wet dog turd it was, I would have rooted for the Maya to be correct.

Nevertheless, even whilst hiding my shame, and of course celebrating Christmas, I had full plans to do something the Steelers haven't done in a month, finish strong.

And then I came down with a sniffling, sneezing, coughing, achy, nauseous, sore, exhausting sick that has lingered until, well right now. Normally, I get two or three colds a year, none of which last very long. This one, though, seemed to be making up for past colds with a vengeance.

So bear with me this week. We'll be back next week to put a bow on the 2012 season for at least 20 teams, start up the coaching carousel which has surprisingly not started yet and Rex Ryan is desperately trying to get a ride on, and start looking at the candidates for the Next Super Bowl Champion. Hmmm, that made me think of a rather cheesy reality show. Eh, we'll save that for next week.

On Tap This Week

Ok, my dream of a last gasp charge to the front wheezed out pretty pathetically last week. I mean, come on Steelers, Cowboys and Giants, all you had to do for the playoffs was win a game against a beatable opponent!

Last week: 8-7

Season to Date: 153-87

Regardless, at least we have one week left, and the time to say goodbye to some familiar faces on familiar teams and a few long term coaches who will soon be out of work. Ahhh, memories......

Sunday

Chicago (9-6) at Detroit (4-11)

Umm, Chicago can still make the playoffs right? Yeesh, lately these teams have been my bane.

Bears over Lions

New York Jets (6-9) at Buffalo (5-10)

It's the draft position Bowl! Yay!

Bills over Jets

Tampa Bay (6-9) at Atlanta (13-2)

I believe Atlanta will finish strong. But what I really want to see out of them will not potentially happen for two weeks. Let's talk then.

Falcons over Buccaneers

Carolina (6-9) at New Orleans (7-8)

Come on Drew, one more just to stick it to Goodell and his "reinstatement" of Sean Payton, future Cowboy coach.

Saints over Panthers

Houston (12-3) at Indianapolis (10-5)

Ummm, Sure, why not the Texans.

Texans over Colts

Jacksonville (2-13) at Tennessee (5-10)

Ok, come on Jacksonville. You have the inside track to the number one pick. Don't screw this up.

Titans over Jaguars

Cleveland (5-10) at Pittsburgh (7-8)

Am I happy Pittsburgh will miss the playoffs for the first time since 2006? No. But I think if some of the younger guys learn you have to do the work to get there, the team will be better off in the long run. Troy Polamalu agrees with me. And I'll admit, there's a small part of me that would like to see them get a better draft spot. But it's small.

Steelers over Browns

Baltimore (10-5) at Cincinnati (9-6)

Ugh. No matter who wins, I lose.

Ravens over Bengals

Philadelphia (4-11) at New York Giants (8-7)

Hey Eli, do you think you can beat Napoleon Dynamite? After the last few weeks, I have my doubts.

Giants over Eagles

Arizona (5-10) at San Francisco (10-4-1)

Oh I'm rooting for the Cardinals, because it would be hilarious if Jim Harbaugh blew a division lead that was in the bag. But even I doubt that would happen.

49ers over Cardinals

Kansas City (2-13) at Denver (12-3)

One, no rest for Peyton Manning this year. He's playing every down he can. And even Kansas City can't screw up the first pick in the draft, no matter who will be around to make the pick.

Broncos over Chiefs

Green Bay (11-4) at Minnesota (9-6)

Is anyone else wondering how much easier the end of the season might have been for Green Bay if they hadn't been cheated out of a victory against Seattle? Wait, too soon to bring that up?

Packers over Vikings

Miami (7-8) at New England (11-4)

Come on, you and I both know Gronkowski is fine. Belichick just doesn't see the need for him to risk injury pummeling Miami.

Patriots over Dolphins

Oakland (4-11) at San Diego (6-9)

Thank you Norv Turner, we'll all miss your expressionless failures.

Chargers over Raiders

St. Louis (7-7-1) at Seattle (10-5)

How many teams are feeling stupid about passing on Russell Wilson now?

Seahawks over Rams

Dallas (8-7) at Washington (9-6)

Anyone else find it funny that 7 weeks ago Mike Shanahan basically gave up on the season?

Redskins over Cowboys