The Crystal Ball 2011 Week 15

I ask this question at least 5 times every Sunday and never get a logical answer. How do you false start at home?

Opening Kickoff

It would seem that the Cardinals and Seahawks are playing good football just in time for a late season push to win the division. Do they know the 49ers locked that up weeks ago?

The Way It Was

Oh, so that’s what the Dream Team looks like. Huh, not bad.

How about we just say if you play pro football in Florida, I don’t know you. Yeah, that should cover all the bases. Seriously, how can every team in that state be so bad?

I got sucked into those damn Panthers, again, and they crapped the bed on me, again. Like I said, call me Stupid.

How do you miss a 36 yard field goal at home???? If I were Jeff Reed, I’d drive down to Carolina right now because Olindo Mare may be soon unemployed.

Come on, New Orleans, do you really have that much trouble playing outdoors?

Funny, how in a renaissance season, with a total revamping of the quarterback and wide receiver positions, a new dedication to defense and cleaning house of all the old troubles, problem children and other distractions, it took until week 14 for the old Marvin Lewis to come back and blow a game they had won.

Congratulations to Houston for making the playoffs for the first time in franchise history. The good people of Houston will now get to see a home playoff game in their fair city for the first time since 1993. That’s a long drought, almost as long as Pittsburgh’s been waiting for playoff baseball. *Sigh*

Ok, I feel bad for Cowboys fans. Just when they find a running back in DeMarco Murray whose talent looks to be able to overcome questionable coaching and dumb ownership, the kid breaks his ankle and is out for the season. What does a fan base have to do get catch a break? Oh, sorry Browns fans, I didn’t see you there.

Congrats to Rob Gronkowski for setting the single season touchdown record by a tight end. Ok, just a quick defensive note for any of New England’s remaining opponents, COVER-THIS-GUY! Yes, he is that good.

Let’s be quite honest now. The only reason London Fletcher was flagged for his hit on Tom Brady was because the hit was on Tom Brady. That was a clean hit nowhere near the head. Unless Brady had a picture of a helmet taped to his midsection, I cannot see where there is a shot to the helmet. Watch it again, and please, someone show me exactly where Fletcher is touching Brady’s head?

Tom Brady got into a heated argument with offensive coordinator Bill O’Brien after he threw a bad interception. The argument became so intense, Bill Belichick had to come over and settle things down. You know Tom, some quarterback leaders don’t need to act like a giant a-hole to inspire their offense. Why don’t you talk to your counterpart after today’s game to find out how it’s done?

Boy, the Vikings just wouldn’t say quit. Hey, good for them I like that kind of fight. Yeah, the season may be lost, but that doesn’t mean you give up the ship. Good job guys.

Hmmm, that was a tremendous whooping Jacksonville laid on Tampa Bay. That will probably do it for the Raheem Morris era. If it wasn’t, the loss to the Cowboys Saturday night then iced that cake.

Funny, the Jaguars beat down the Buccaneers 41-14, and then lose to Atlanta by the exact same score. Ok, maybe not ha ha funny, but at least an interesting coincidence.

Ok, I think the feed the beast stuff in Seattle is pretty lame. But raining Skittles down on Marshawn Lynch when he scores a touchdown is pretty fun.

Well, they did it again. The defense kept it close; Tim Tebow gave them a chance, Matt Prater won the game in overtime and Denver keeps rolling. Seriously, how much fun is this team?

The Steel Pit

With no game until Monday night, allow me a moment to rant.

The team announced that if left guard Doug Legursky were needed to start at center, Trai Essex would fill in at left guard and I couldn’t be happier. Not because Essex is a tremendous talent that will change the course of a game, but because that means Chris Kemoeatu is stuck on the bench.

I am so sick and tired of Kemoeatu and his constant penalty filled play. The man has taken Willie Colon's ability to create drive killing penalties and take it to a new level. The team obviously felt the same way when they installed a healthy Legursky at left guard, a position Kemoeatu has manned for over 4 seasons now. But his undisciplined play has led the Steelers to finally make a change.

The crazy part is Kemoeatu is like any player, a competitor who wants to play. So you would think when injury gave him another opportunity he would have grabbed it and ran with it. But no, when he came off the bench last week, he incurred three drive killing penalties in just two quarters of work. Show me how that’s a man who gets he needs to change the way he plays. I’m sensing shades of James Harrison here, but I digress.

But at this point in the season the team has limited options. But going forward in the future, the options are still restricted depending on player availability and draft options. The only true solution I can think of is the team needs a better backup center. Oh, don't get me wrong, Legursky is fantastic in that role. But if he needs to relieve Pouncey, then that means we lose Legursky at left guard, which means we have Kemoeatu back in the game.

Look, I understand Kemoeatu has all the physical tools you need and could want in an interior lineman, but his mental mistakes are devastating and drive killers. Obviously the coaching staff feels the same way since he's been demoted from starter and hopefully they get rid of his big juicy fanny in the offseason too. Super Bowl contender windows don't stay open forever and the Steelers know they need to take advantage while we can. Just ask Indianapolis about that.

And I'm not taking that game out on him solely, I know Heath Miller, Hines Ward, Ramon Foster, James Farrior, Ike Taylor, and James Harrison (more on that later) also had a few boneheaded plays, but they made mistakes and then righted themselves and moved on. Kemoeatu just keeps making them. You'd think he’d do more with an opportunity to prove himself again.

No matter how talented and skilled a player may be, there comes a point where they have to progress past making rookie type mistakes. If that point never comes, then they become a detriment instead of a positive influence. Kemoeatu has now reached that point and his Steeler career may be coming to a close. I would suggest Willie Colon pay close attention to how this season is playing out. Obviously, false starts and holding calls are no longer acceptable faux pas for Steeler linemen, and I am happy to finally see such improvement.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

The NFL unanimously approved Shahid Khan as the new owner of the Jacksonville Jaguars. Oh man, I’m already digging a guy who rocks such an awesome mustache!

So while the media and NFL universe has been losing its mind over James Harrison’s hit, it turns out the real bad guy here is the Cleveland coaching and medical staff, who never actually tested Colt McCoy for a concussion before sending him back into the game. Now explain to me again how Harrison is the one suspended when Cleveland blatantly skipped the basic tenants of the new concussion rules?

If you’re like me, and some most definitely are vehemently not, you just can’t get enough Tebow. Well, Fox Sports has fixed all that with their new Tim Tebow page. All Tebow, all the time! Oh how much to I enjoy knowing how much this ticks off all the NFL know it alls who still keep arguing he’s a crappy quarterback.

Speaking of Tebow, are you looking for that perfect Christmas gift for you Tebow/Bronco loving sports fan? How about a Tim Tebow Tebowing Fathead? Say that 5 times really fast.

Texans first year defensive coordinator Wade Phillips, who has completely turned around the defensive unit and team to the point I would vote for him as coach of the year, is going on medical leave for a few weeks. While I hope Phillips is ok, I am wondering if the Houston coaching staff is resting their starters for the playoffs. If so well played Gary Kubiak.

A Jets fan was insulted and then severely beaten by a group of Chiefs fans after the Jets/Chiefs game last week. What is wrong with people? It’s just a game! Yes watching your favorite team lose is never fun, but it happens, deal with it. And throwing out 9/11 insults? Are you serious? Is the cost of going to a game not enough of a deterrent for your average fan anymore, now we have to think about getting our asses kicked and pummeled by the type of insults terrorists would throw out to provoke us too?

Wow, look at Eli Manning, he’s actually backing up his preseason claims of being an elite quarterback. Color me surprised and impressed. According to this article, his 4^th quarter numbers are even better than comeback king Tim Tebow. If Eli’s even better in the 4th quarter than Tebow, how much fun would it be if the giants and broncos both faced off in the Super Bowl? I think more than a few people just puked at the idea.

Upon Further Review

Well Roger Goodell finally found a way to punish James Harrison for making him look like a clown in a national magazine interview and suspended him for one game for his hit on Browns quarterback Colt McCoy.

The NFL, and the Steelers, is holding the company line that this suspension is a result of Harrison breaking the rules and being a repeat offender. Those are the facts and they are indisputable. Also is a fact that this was Harrison’s first penalty against a quarterback, or in general, all season. Obviously James has changed his playing style, yet that did not play into Goodell’s decision in suspending Harrison.

Don’t buy any lame explanation from the NFL that this is about safety or about rules. It’s about Harrison personally. If you don’t believe me, then answer me this. Why does Harrison get repeatedly fined for at times seemingly innocuous hits when Baltimore’s Terrell Suggs, who while playing as intensely as Harrison and adds an element of dirtiness, never get fined or suspended or blasted in the national media? Watch Suggs, I bet you could pull game tape from any game this season and you’ll find at least one play in each game where Suggs commits a flagrant foul, either a face mask, hands to the face, late hit, roughing the passer or unsportsmanlike conduct, and it’s never flagged. And there is never a fine either.

Heck, most of Baltimore’s defense operates this way, and you never hear about it. Last season Haloti Ngata blatantly punched Ben Roethlisberger in the face, smashing his nose and it wasn’t even flagged as a hit to the head. And if we recall, the NFL has deemed all hits to the head of a quarterback illegal, flaggable and fineable. Ngata barely got pocket change taken out of his pay for felonious assault and doesn’t get a public dressing down about changing his game. Harrison changes his game after a very public pissing match with Goodell, one Harrison finally realized he can’t win, and he has one bad hit and boom, he’s sitting at home.

What’s the difference between Ngata, Suggs and Harrison? Harrison openly questions Goodell, his methods, the NFL’s definition of illegal, the consistency of punishment and fines and Goodell’s judge, jury and executioner routine while Suggs and other players who play on the edge like Harrison just keep their mouth shut and off Goodell’s radar. In Saturday night’s Dallas game another questionable hit occurred with no flag. But if Harrison had made the hit, he would have been ejected. The team knows this too.

Whether you think Harrison is a thug or Pittsburgh is targeted by the NFL matters not. The simple truth is the rules, their enforcement and their prescribed punishment are all in an ambiguous area and as unpredictable as the weather. The Steelers have been the most vocal team in regards to demanding accountability and consistency, and for their efforts have been only rewarded with escalating fines, public derision from the league and now suspensions.

Goodell maintains he is trying to make a safer, cleaner game but the facts do not back up his words. If this stance were true, concussion reducing helmets would be mandatory throughout the league, head shot protection rules would be extended to running backs in general and wide receivers at all times and not just quarterbacks, other defensive teams that play on the edge would start being punished more often and Goodell and the NFL would make public how they deem illegal hits, create a consistent punishment schedule and enforce all infractions. Until these things happen, I maintain this is about Harrison and Goodell and has nothing to do with safety.

But if those points don’t convince you this is personal, think about this. If the NFL and Roger Goodell were truly concerned about player safety and not about sticking it to James Harrison, would the league have been fine with selling game pictures of a concussed Colt McCoy?

Duck Duck Coach

We’re still not at the point for this feature to come back weekly, but it’s obvious we need another update.

Indianapolis – no word yet, still waiting for the axe to fall on Caldwell. I’m wondering if he’ll even notice if he’s fired.

Jacksonville – Considering their play in Atlanta, I don’t think Mel Tucker has a chance to have that interim tag removed.

Kansas City – The Chiefs decided the fiery but overmatched Todd Haley is not what the team needs and fired him Monday. I guess lucking into one division championship is not enough to save a job anymore.

Miami – The Dolphins finally, weeks after they should have, put poor Tony Sparano out of his misery and fired him on Monday as well. Does general manager Jeff Ireland realize that if Dolphin owner Stephen Ross is serious about landing Bill Cowher that means Ireland is mere weeks away from being fired as well?

He Said He Said

“I don't perceive Todd Haley as a mistake. Todd Haley is a good football coach. I'll say that. What we need to do is figure out what direction we're headed in and how we're going to continue to make progress, how we can get some consistency back.” - Chiefs GM Scott Pioli on firing head coach Todd Haley

Translation, I just like keeping my job more than backing Todd Haley.

"Hey Ben! You Tebowed 'em!'' – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin to Ben Roethlisberger in the locker room after the game

Bwha ha ha!

"I don't care. Call as many timeouts as you want.'' – Broncos kicker Matt Prater on being iced

Now that’s the kind of kicker you want on your team.

"You know what's fun about this? Everyone keeps saying what Tim can't do. And he goes out every week and we win. We love the guy. He's so real. Now we just feel like anything's possible.'' – Broncos kicker Matt Prater

That kids is the basic definition of intangibles, why the Broncos are playing better as a team and winning and what ticks off NFL analysts the most who keep trying to quantify every aspect of a violent, emotion-fueled game in which everything cannot be quantified.

"A long line of coaches and players are pretty pissed at me after that. We're both pretty emotional guys so that's what I deserve, you know. If you make bad plays, you're supposed to get yelled at by your coaches. It was just a stupid play by me.'' – Patriots quarterback Tom Brady on getting chewed out

Do you think he’d be so magnanimous and willing to say he deserved the verbal dressing down if New England had lost? Me either.

“He’s a good running back.” - Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher on Tim Tebow

“It wasn’t anything special that he did.” – Bears defensive end Julius Peppers on Tim Tebow

Awww come on boys, there’s no need to be sore losers.

Idiot of the Week

I think everyone in the Chicago area would agree with me when I bestow the crown of idiot to Bears running back Marion Barber.

Barber wins this week for twice failing to apply the kind of basic football knowledge that high school kids are taught on a daily basis.

Instance one – With Chicago holding the ball, all they needed to do was keep the clock moving and gain one first down to run all the time off the game clock, keep Denver from getting the ball back and win the game. Denver had no more time outs and could do nothing to stop the precious time from wicking away. But on an expected running play, Barber ran out of bounds. Basic football knowledge lesson number one is if you want to run time off the clock, stay in bounds. This stopped the clock, helped prevent Chicago from gaining the needed first down and gave Denver the ball back with enough time to get down the field and kick the tying field goal.

Instance two – Now deep in Denver territory and holding the ball in overtime, the Bears had a chance at a field goal to win game. Barber gets a chance at redemption. All he has to do is run straight ahead and advance the ball. But he ignores basic football knowledge lesson two, keep both hands on the ball and make sure it is firmly secured. Barber did not; Denver stripped the ball and recovered the fumble. Tebow drove the offense to field goal range and Matt Prater took care of the rest.

So for showing a lack of football knowledge, not once but twice, that would get a high school player benched, and making such game killing gaffes that it not only gave the other team a chance but ended up costing your team a game they never should have lost, Marion Barber you are an idiot.

On Tap This Week

Look it’s the return of Saturday Night Football! Oh wait, I’m sorry, I mean the special Saturday edition of Thursday Night Football. Seriously NFL Network, you need to come up with a better title for Saturday games.

Last week: 10-5

Thursday: 1-0

Saturday: 1-0

Season to Date: 141-70

Yes, still doing well, but I just cannot seem to get that one tremendous week. Perhaps this week will be the one.

Sunday

Washington (4-9) at New York Giants (7-6)

That season ending game between Dallas and New York is going to be tremendous with both teams tied and the division on the line for a winner takes all showdown. New York takes another step to make sure that happens.

Giants over Redskins

New Orleans (10-3) at Minnesota (2-11)

Ahhh, back in the comfort of a dome.

Saints over Vikings

Carolina (4-9) at Houston (10-3)

Nope, not again, never again!

Texans over Panthers

Seattle (6-7) at Chicago (7-6)

Ok, I guess we’ll go Bears here. But I don’t feel good about it. Maybe getting Tebowed will tick them off appropriately. Although, I am feeling very timid about this pick because once you’ve been Tebowed you’re never the same.

Bears over Seahawks

Tennessee (7-6) at Indianapolis (0-13)

Oh come on, like Indy will stumble this close to the goal line.

Titans over Colts

Green Bay (13-0) at Kansas City (5-8)

Like Kansas City had a chance with Todd Haley calling the plays.

Packers over Chiefs

Miami (4-9) at Buffalo (5-8)

Ok, just one more time, if only for old times’ sake.

Bills over Dolphins

Cincinnati (7-6) at St. Louis (2-11)

Ok, perhaps the Bungles can handle this level of competition.

Bengals over Rams

Detroit (8-5) at Oakland (7-6)

Looks like that Carson Palmer trade is looking shrewder as the weeks go by. Jason Campbell must be feeling good about his status for next season.

Lions over Raiders

Cleveland (4-9) at Arizona (6-7)

Brown fans will watch this game and think; wow I wish we had John Skelton. Yes, it’s gotten that sad.

Cardinals over Browns

New England (10-3) at Denver (8-5)

Call me a fool, call me stupid, and call me crazy I don’t care. This party train is too fun to get off of at this station. Tebow!

Broncos over Patriots

New York Jets (8-5) at Philadelphia (5-8)

Ugh, I know I’ll hate myself for this tomorrow, but….

Eagles over Jets

Baltimore (10-3) at San Diego (6-7)

Yes, I do believe the Norv Turner job saving late season push will continue again this week. And yes, a big part of this belief comes from the fact that I really need it to happen.

Chargers over Ravens

Monday

Pittsburgh (10-3) at San Francisco (10-3)

Let’s see, no Harrison and potentially no Woodley, no Polamalu, no Pouncey and no Roethlisberger. No problem?

Steelers over 49ers