The Crystal Ball 2010 Season Wrap Up

Yes, it feels funny putting the coda on the 2010 season whilst the 2011 season hangs in a precarious balance. But hey, why not look back at a simpler time when men hit each other wearing plastic armor for millions and owners watched from their luxury boxes through Botoxed faces and earned millions. Oh if only we could go back.

Opening Kickoff

First off, who would have thought cheese could cut steel? They make a powerful blend in Wisconsin.

And second, I must apologize for taking so long in returning, but I went to The Crystal Ball headquarters to wrap up the season and found the doors locked. I wonder how that happened.

The Way It Was

Super Bowl XLV

Steelers 25 – Packers 31

Congratulations to the Green Bay Packers in securing their 4^th Super Bowl win and 13^th overall championship. I tip my hat to you.

Now suppose for a moment you knew nothing about the recent past in the NFL. If I asked you to name the team making its first Super Bowl appearance, what would you answer? Yup, you would have said the Steelers.

No matter what talent and experience a team may have, if they make mistake after mistake, and their opponent capitalizes on each one, well then said opponent is the better team. And without a doubt Green Bay was the better team on Super bowl Sunday.

Look, I know Pittsburgh screwed up royally more than a few times; I’m looking in your direction Roethlisberger and Mendenhall. But don't give me the argument that the Packers didn't win but rather the Steelers lost the game. Yeah, we lost the game, threw it away with dumb mistakes, bad penalties and poor ball security. And the Packers won by capitalizing on every dumb mistake Pittsburgh made, which is the sign of a good team. I feel a cleansing cloud washing over me.

Ugh but come on you dang Packers, do something so I can be pissed off and get it out of my system completely. Give me something! Call Troy over rated, or Harrison soft, or Ben a douche, wait I do that. But come on, do something!

But as much as I try, and demand they do something to really tick me off, I find I still can't hate on the Packers. They won with class and without any off the field nonsense. Even after hearing about the team getting sized for Super Bowl rings the night before the game, which should have ticked me off royally, it didn’t. If anything, I thought it was a brilliant motivational tool by Packer head coach Mike McCarthy.

At the very least, as a conciliatory victory I found that my theory regarding scandals and distractions as a barometer for picking Super Bowl winners held true for another correct Super Bowl prediction. If I hadn’t been such a homer, I might have taken my own advice and picked Green Bay. Ok, probably not, but I would have urged others.., no probably not. Never mind, at least my hypothesis is shaking out nicely.

And I was right; the Packer fans really did need this win, even more so than I thought. And bless those cheese head wearing fans; they do know how to party.

In other Super Bowl news, this year’s edition set a new all time television viewing record. This was made possible due to the people who went to the game and found out they did not have a seat for their ticket were forced to watch on TV and driving up ratings. Looks like Jerry Jones set a record anyway.

While suffering through another oddball Super Bowl halftime, wow I’m so surprised they played Let’s Get It Started, the Lady K commented that it looked like wil.i.am was wearing Gary Oldman’s leftover plastic head prop from The Fifth Element. Come on NFL, this was an old school Super Bowl with old school teams; you should have provided old school entertainment. Where were the gigantic Paper Mache players in the middle of the field battling it out? Where was a Terrible Towel that covered the entire field? Where were the high school marching bands? Where was Up With People for goodness sake???

Wow, look an entire post season behind us and not one single overtime game. I guess it’s a good thing the NFL changed those overtime rules for the playoffs, huh?

The Steel Pit

Super Bowl Sunday was, quite frankly, a bad day in Pittsburgh. First the Penguins were trounced, then Christina Aguilera, yeah she’s from Pittsburgh, screwed up the national anthem. And then by halftime we were cleaning up vomit from watching the team’s first half performance. Woof. The only thing missing were the Pirates blowing another game.

There is no sugar coating it, no excuses, and no referees to blame. Without a doubt the better team, the better prepared, hungrier and more polished Green Bay Packers won the game and they deserve every accolade that comes their way.

Pittsburgh looked flat, made numerous mistakes, and gave the ball up constantly while being unable to force even one Green Bay turnover. It was quite frankly a bitter pill to swallow.

And after an appropriate period of numbness followed by the expected trip through The Kübler-Ross model, I came to one conclusion. It was still a good season. Yes, it ended with a terrible disappointment, but hey, it was merely that, a disappointment. 30 other teams would have given their eyeteeth to trade places with Pittsburgh.

I really thought Pittsburgh would grant me an early birthday present, but I guess three big presents in six years is a bit much to ask for. But hey, they still gave me a memorable season despite the trials and tribulations, so I thank them nonetheless.

And more importantly, after how this season began, and progressed, with fines, suspensions, injuries, player releases, player signings and rule changes, it’s quite an accomplishment for this team to even get as far as they did. And even during the game that they were even in it at the end after playing so poorly was an accomplishment in and of itself. So my hats off to Pittsburgh for another good season full of triumph, despair, joys and sorrows, delicious snacks, tasty beverages, great friends, big fun and lots of football. Next year, if there is one, let’s make it Super.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

Let’s clear the baffles of some Super Bowl related weirdness, and a bit of other nifty craziness, that has happened in the NFL universe before they locked the doors and turned off the lights.

Apparently, Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez was upset being shown on national TV during the Super Bowl being fed popcorn by Cameron Diaz. Yeah, that’s awful. It must be so difficult having the world see an attractive movie star playfully feed you popcorn at the biggest sporting event in North America. What a putz.

It would seem that casinos and sports books made scant profit from Super Bowl gambling. What a dumb story, that’s as dumb as saying, oh, gee, I have $10 Billion and I cannot figure out how to split it up amongst my co-workers and employees.

HA! This was a funny cartoon. Humor, it eases the pain.

Roger Goodell, in trying to rectify the damage from the Super Bowl seating fiasco, stated that all displaced fans at the game would be rewarded. Hey Roger, how about us fans who couldn't afford to go to this, or any, Super Bowl? You know, 99% of America? Where’s our reward Roger? Oh yeah, we get rewarded with the first work stoppage in over 20 years. I forgot. Thanks Heir Goodell

Steeler’s defensive end Brett Keisel shaved off his mammoth beard a few weeks after the Super Bowl during a rousing evening with plenty of Steeler players and fans in attendance. The event raised money for Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh. While the beard could not push the team all the way to the Lombardi Trophy, its demise will help sick children, and that is much better than any Tiffany silver in my book.

Tiki Barber has decided to unretire and return to the NFL, and will sign with any team that wants him, when and if teams are able to sign free agents. Let’s not kid ourselves, this is not a love of the game move, this is an I need money move.

Jets cornerback Darrelle Revis, whose team will win the Super Bowl next year according to head coach Rex Ryan, wants Chad Ochocinco as his teammate. Oh Ochocinco in New York? That should end well.

Bungles quarterback Carson Palmer is selling his house in Cincinnati, reinforcing his demand that the team trades him or he’ll retire. Come on Carson, this is Cincinnati, not Cleveland. Settle down.

The Minnesota Vikings are going ahead with a plan to replace the roof of the damaged Metrodome, which will take months. Good thing that lockout came when it did, or it might not be ready for the beginning of the season. You’re your time guys.

Michael Vick cancelled an appearance on The Oprah Winfrey show, and the Eagles denied they had any part in his decision not to appear on her talk show. I didn’t think you could cancel on Oprah and not end up living the rest of your life on a deserted island.

Columnist Brad Wilbricht theorized that the Cardinals losing Larry Fitzgerald could actually be a gain to the team. How do you figure? My guess for a Cardinal gain would be a quarterback who can complete a pass.

Foxsports.com columnist Jason Whitlock and SI.com NFL senior writer Peter King got into a fun little tete a tete over the Hall of Fame and it’s voting. It started with Whitlock blasting the HOF journalist members and their voting methods, and King defending the organization and his involvement. Personally, I was hoping this would devolve into a steel cage match, but the story just kinda died away. Come on, we need some violent entertainment without football!

And finally, with nothing better to do in the off season, and a future career in the media to think about, Hines Ward agreed to appear on the latest season of Dancing With The Stars. I typically have no interest in this show or others like it, but Hines Ward and Ralph Macchio on the same stage? I may have to watch just to see if Ralph teaches Hines how to sweep the leg.

Duck Duck Coach

In the final installment, unless some weird changes happen this summer and with the labor battle and Al Davis still involved in the league do not count it out; let’s look at the one final team that needed someone who appeared to be in charge.

Titans – Owner Bud Adams looked within his organization and hired Mike Munchak as the new head coach of Tennessee. Munchak then went wild on the coaching staff and cleaned house. Good luck getting a team ready to play with a lockout there Mike. And that goes for all the first year head coaches out there, too.

He Said He Said

"I had a feeling we were going to do it again. But we should have never been in that situation" – Steelers receiver Hines Ward on another potential game ending Super Bowl winning drive

You and every Steeler fan worldwide had that feeling, as I’m sure more than a few nervous Packer fans too.

“There’s a lot of throws I’d like to have back. I don’t put the blame on anybody except myself. I feel like I let the city of Pittsburgh down, the fans, my coaches, my teammates. It’s not a good feeling.” – Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger after the loss

Just remember the immortal words of Bill Cowher. Sometimes you win sometimes you lose.

"They made the plays on defense. We didn't." – Steelers safety Troy Polamalu

Turns out it was a good story for the Packers.

"We're not into moral victories. We came here to win." – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin

Sooooo, what happened then?

"You know how bad I want this, guys ...'' Packers cornerback Charles Woodson to his team at halftime after breaking his collarbone and being out for the remainder of the game.

Considering he initially tried to play after the injury, I’d say he wanted it really bad. Enjoy the moment Charles, you earned it. Pittsburgh could have used a few guys who wanted it that bad.

“You simply can't fumble with the Super Bowl on the line, with your team driving to take the lead in the fourth quarter. But Mendenhall did, and it was the single biggest factor in the Pittsburgh loss.” – SI.com’s Peter King

Oh now be fair Peter. There were plenty of factors in that loss, that was just one of the more glaring.

"I've never felt like there's been a monkey on my back. The organization stood behind me, believed in me. I told Ted (Thompson) back in 2005 he wouldn't be sorry with this pick. I told him in '08 that I was going to repay their trust and get us this opportunity at a Super Bowl.'' - Super Bowl MVP Aaron Rodgers on replacing Brett Favre in the hearts and minds of the Packer faithful

Well, I give Rodgers immense credit for not acting like an infantile jackass like Steve Young did after his Super Bowl win as a starter replacing Joe Montana. Rodgers is too cool and would never do that. NEVER EVER!

Idiot of the Season

Oh who will be the final idiot of 2010, and be remembered forever as the biggest idiot of the season? What an honor to be the standard bearer for an entire season. I toyed with going back and looking at our previous idiots, and weighing the merits of each. But that became unnecessary when Jerry Jones and the NFL stepped into the breach with their seating controversy and claimed the crown of Idiot of the Season.

To refresh our memories, and because it’s so much fun to rehash, Jones and the NFL caused a major issue when several thousand fans showed up for the game, then had to wait in interminably long security lines, only to find out the tickets they had were for seats that did not exist.

The NFL was already having a PR nightmare with the freakish weather Dallas went through during game week, and the areas poor attempts to combat the ice and cold. Come on, sand? Really? And while that was bad enough, there really isn’t anything you can do about the weather. But having people travel from all over the country to find out the money they spent on tickets, travel, accommodations and souvenirs was for not? Super bad.

Apparently, this fiasco came into play due to poor construction and unsafe conditions on temporary seating that was to be installed in the stadium prior to the game. I know they had more than a month to get the work done, what could have been the problem?

It would seem the entire plan was rife with problems. The most glaring at the time of the game was there was no alternate plan in place in what to do with the fans if the seats were not going to be ready in time. Not only that, but the fans without seats had no real information of what was going on, where they would be seated or why any of it was happening. And from all accounts, there was no way they would be ready in time, and Jones and the NFL knew this well in advance.

The more of this fiasco that came out in the following days, the more people go ticked off. The NFL attempted to placate the displaced fans, with refunds, travel vouchers and tickets to another Super Bowl, but that did not go as well as they hoped. Soon after, and not surprisingly, the lawsuits started flying.

Weeks afterward, Jerry Jones finally poked his head up from behind a half finished bleacher and attempted to apologize, but by then the damage had long been done. And unfortunately for him, Roger Goodell and the NFL, the trouble had already boiled over.

And why, you may ask, did they go to all this trouble, only to create a maelstrom of bad press and ticked off fans? Because the NFL and Jerry Jones were desperately trying to break the Super Bowl attendance record, even going so far as to count the party patio patrons, say that three times real fast, as attendees, despite the fact they could not watch the actual game live, just be present at the stadium and watch it on giant TVs. And despite all of their ridiculous attempts, and having two teams playing where the fan bases would have paid to sit in the aisles just to be a part of the game, they still could not break the attendance record. I guess that didn't work out too well did it guys?

And to think there was a time when people thought a punt hitting Jerry's TV would have been the worst thing to happen at Cowboys Stadium.

So for managing to screw up hosting the Super Bowl, alienating fans, being unprepared for the weather, ticking off ticket holders, covering your tracks about knowing extra temporary seating might be a bad idea and not go well, being unprepared for the backlash that followed and getting cinchy when offering bribes, I mean refunds, Jerry Jones and the NFL you are the 2010 season Idiot champions.

Now don’t try to go two for two and screw up the 2011 season.

On Tap This Week

Ok, one final item for this season, the overall record.

Super Bowl Weekend: 0-1

Season to date: 164-103

Ewwww, that last one just kind of puts the turd in the jelly jar, no? Well, there’s always next year.

Wait, what? There might not be? You’re telling me that people with more money than they know what to do with cannot figure out, what to do with it? Get out. No way would the NFL and the NFLPA be stupid enough to have a major labor dispute over almost $10 Billion in an economy where people are losing jobs, homes, cars and have trouble making ends meet. No way would they rub that in the faces of their loyal fans. What? They did? Huh. It sounds like we need to investigate and pronto.

Well fear not gridiron aficionados, there is still football available. For those who dig Roller Derby and women who can kick fanny, check out Women’s Professional Football. You will not be disappointed. Or check out the newly revamped Arena League Football. As they say, half the field, twice the excitement. Not sure about the excitement claim, but the field is half as big.

And with that, I leave you with the memories of the 2010 season. Hold them, cherish them, and think of them often fondly. Because if these knuckleheads cannot figure out how to split a very expensive pie soon, it might be all you have.

Check back soon when we will delve into the upcoming 2011 season, and the ongoing labor impasse.