The Crystal Ball Return of the Big Douche

“If stupid, immature behavior were against the law, they could lock Roethlisberger up and throw away the key.” – Pittsburgh Post-Gazette’s Ron Cook

I think they could lock us all away Ron.


On Sunday at 1pm, Ben Roethlisberger, dubbed by me for this season as Big Douche, will return to the field as the starting quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers. Roethlisberger, as all by now know, is returning from a suspension imposed by the NFL for violating the NFL Personal Conduct Policy when he became embroiled in a sexual assault investigation in March of this year.

Questions have abounded during the past two weeks, from local, regional and national media outlets, regarding Roethlisberger’s return. How will Ben look will he be rusty? (So far, no) How will his teammates welcome him back? (With open arms thus far) Will this change the team’s new commitment to the running game? (A resounding no from all parties) How is he now as a person and player? (So far open, gregarious, gracious, humbled and ready to start a new chapter in his life)

One of the biggest questions, by far, seems to be how the fans will react. When the story first broke and throughout the investigation by both Georgia authorities and the NFL Roethlisberger faced a public happy to heap vitriol upon the troubled quarterback. Fans of the team mailed #7 jerseys back to their headquarters along with nasty notes, talk radio shows fielded call after call from fired up fans ready to burn Roethlisberger at the stake for this and other slights. Stories abounded of how he treated people poorly and leveraged his star power to get what he wanted, whether it was skipping out on cover charges or even dinner tabs to outright ill-mannered behavior. The Pittsburgh Zoo dumped him, in favor of Penguin legend Mario Lemieux. And while Big Ben paraphernalia sales plummeted, including him losing his beef jerky sponsorship deal, sales of items designed to make fun of Big Ben skyrocketed. My favorite easily being the t-shirt portraying him and Tiger Woods together with the tagline Dumb and Dumber.

But the fans were not the only ones jumping into the fray. Team mates questioned his dedication, national media outlets and prominent NFL writers penned scathing commentary regarding Roethlisberger’s maturity, intelligence and foolish behavior. One of the most prominent, loud and consistent voices easily was Fox commentator, and former Steeler, Terry Bradshaw, who has taken it seemingly as a personal mission to rip Big Ben at almost every opportunity, as evidenced here, here and unexpectedly here. I still wonder if Roethlisberger was watching the Fox pregame show that day.

I’m not about to do that and pile on. When it boils down, the only two people that really know what happened that night were in the back of a club in Georgia, and both were most likely liquored up enough even they are not sure exactly what happened. And frankly, he should have never been there in the first place. He’s the face of an NFL franchise with a $100 million contract and one of the top 5 quarterbacks in the NFL, not a college senior during a post finals blowout. Plus, come on, with that amount of fame, money and clout, someone of his stature could find a much better place to try and have a liaison than a club bathroom. I’ve been to enough clubs and bars to know what their restroom facilities look like, and I try to avoid touching anything in them.

Besides, over the last seven months, Roethlisberger has had plenty of people ready to tear him a new cornhole for his lack of thought, disrespecting attitude, selfish and boorish conduct.

That’s not to say I’m letting him off the hook either. He faced serious allegations and the fact that twice in a year two different women came forth to make such claims shows a lack of serious judgment. He’s been embarrassed, chagrined, vilified and ridiculed. He’s been punished; I believe fairly, by his employers for embarrassing the company and suffered monetarily from losing sponsorship deals, both current and future. On top of that, he lost more than a few fans and the respect of many, something it will take him years to rebuild.

But now, he returns having served his punishment. And if one thing comes clear from living in this great country of ours, is we’re always willing to lend a hand, help someone who’s down, and always give someone a second chance. Our justice system is based upon that, if you are punished for your crimes, you can return to society. Well, the NFL punished Ben for being a cad and a lout, and on Sunday he reenters that society.

Yes, I’m sure you know by now that I’m a sap, and I love the redemption story.
And yes, right now Big Ben is poised to be a great redemption story. He has come through this self created ordeal with as he says a new outlook on life, a stronger commitment to family, friends and his team and a better relationship in general with his church, community and fans. He has the benefit of playing in a city that is open, forgiving and the staunchest of defenders to those they deem one of their own. And he rejoins a team many feel are one of the best in the NFL before he returned. And with him, the general consensus is a potential Super Bowl team.

I know what you’re thinking; I’m going to be suckered in like I was with Michael Vick. You know what? Yeah I will be. I truly wanted to believe in Vick as the ultimate redemption story. Despite the intense heat I took from many on supporting his potential redemption, I still stuck by him, thinking yeah, this would be exactly the kind of story that would bring hopefulness and inspiration. But after reading of him trying to create a reality series about his return to football, which seemed to just die on the vine, and the birthday party incident just a few months ago, lets say I question Vick’s sincerity toward change. Yes, he’s done some good things, notably working with the Humane Society, and this season in the press he’s saying all the right things, especially during his interview with Jim Mora. But there’s been just enough to make me wonder if he is changed, or just wants to play football and is willing to do whatever he needs to get that opportunity.

So yeah, I’m getting suckered into Roethlisberger’s turnaround too. And yes, since I am nothing if not an unabashed homer, I’m sure more than a few of you are thinking, oh you’re just hoping for redemption because he’s a Steeler. Well, yeah I am a bit. I should be up front about that. But I’m also hoping for redemption because it’s inspiring to see someone turn their life around for the positive.

I think we need stories like this. Stories about people, who hit rock bottom, turn their lives around and become great once again. It feels good to read those stories. They give hope, inspiration and encouragement to the rest of us who struggle to make our own lives better. We see someone fall so far in the public eye find a way to make their lives right again, and we think, hey, I can do it too. If he can turn it around, I can drop those 30 extra pounds, or find that new career, or find the love of my life, or make my marriage and family life better. I know I’m not the only one. ESPN.com recently had a write up of how former NFL bust Tony Mandarich, who flamed out terribly in the face of massive expectations, has found a successful new life. If there were no interest in this kind of story, there would be no articles like this.

Oftentimes it takes a severe blow for people to realize the track of destruction they are speeding on and put them back on their correct path. Perhaps I’m naïve, or a romantic, or just plain stupid, but I want to believe that one night in Georgia was the severe blow Roethlisberger needed to turn his life around. Perhaps he did get wrapped up in the Big Ben persona and it drove him to behave only in selfish and self serving ways, and this accusation was the wake up call he needed but was unable to create for himself. Was it pretty? No. Was it good for his career or reputation? Hell no. But will it be good for him ultimately down the road as a man and a human being? Undoubtedly yes.

Yes, I’m aware that it’s pretty easy for someone to do and say all the right things when they’re faced with having what they love stripped away from them. And of course, Roethlisberger got a taste of that over the past month so right now he’s pretty dedicated on keeping himself on the right path. The real sign of change comes when you continue to do and say the right things, continue to treat others with respect and dignity and continue working on improving yourself as a person and community member.

So for now, I’ll keep calling him Big Douche for his boneheaded mistakes all whilst rooting for him to continue on his path to redemption and becoming a better man. And if he shows me he really has changed, I’ll cheer louder than anyone, because I’ll have that redemption story I love so much and the hope and inspiration we all need to encourage us to also make positive changes in our own lives. But if shows he’s just doing this to keep his job, well, then Big Douche he’ll always be. If that’s how it goes, then at least I’ll be a bit wiser, a bit more wary on rooting for redemption in the future, and have a nickname I can use for years to follow. And those will be more positive changes for me.