The Crystal Ball 2010 Week 3

Pittsburgh will start Charlie Batch, their only healthy quarterback, on Sunday against Tampa Bay. The irony, of course, being that Charlie got little to no snaps in training camp and preseason and given little chance to win the starting job because the Steelers coaching staff deemed him too fragile.

Opening Kickoff

Ok, so I figured out why Ken Whisenhunt jettisoned Matt Leinart for Derek Anderson. Quite simply, he’s been out of the AFC North for too long. If he’d still been with the Steelers, he’d have seen up close twice a year just how bad Anderson really is. But being tucked away in Phoenix reduced his access to such intimate observations that would have easily stayed his hand in making what is turning out to be a terribly foolish decision. I mean, how else can you explain thinking Derek Anderson is the answer? Even Eric Mangini knew better.

The Way It Was

Boy, the Dolphins sure seem better than advertised. Perhaps time has come to take the current leader in the AFC East seriously?

But the Vikings, not so much. Brett said he came back for the guys. It would seem the guys aren’t getting it done for Brett. Ironic, no?

Favre throws 3 interceptions and was stripped of the ball for a fumble that immediately resulted in a Dolphin touchdown. I love being the one to say it, but perhaps maybe something small like, oh say preseason practice, could have helped?

You know what else training camp helps with? It helps with conditioning and getting into football shape. Maybe Darrelle Revis should have taken that aspect seriously, and then perhaps he and his strained hamstring wouldn’t be on the bench for the next two games. And he wants to hold out in two years? What a chump.

Did Tampa Bay take a way back machine to 2002? Nice showing Raheem Morris with your youth movement thus far.

I liked John Fox going for it on 4th down and goal. I did not like the poor execution. Doesn’t Carolina have two stud running backs?

Boy, the Matt Moore starting quarterback regime lasted about as long as Kevin Kolb’s.

The Dallas offense mustered only 10 points against the revamped Bear defense. Well, I guess that’s better than the 7 they managed in week 1 against the Redskins.

They may not be winning yet, but Detroit sure is playing feisty.

Forget my predictions about a quarterback controversy in Philadelphia; they have a full fledged defensive emergency.

Randy Moss had perhaps the play of the weekend with a scintillating one handed touchdown catch over uber hyped Darrelle Revis. I bet that just intensifies his contract pouting.

Boy, am I sorry I doubted the Neck Beard. And did I ever pay for that.

I feared until the last minute of the Saints/49ers tilt that I made a fundamental error picking the Saints over San Francisco. After all, it was honor Jerry Rice night in prime time. Then I remembered in week 1 Rice gave a pregame pep speech to Seattle, San Francisco's opponent, who then proceeded to deliver a thorough butt whipping on the Niners. And guess what happened after that? Yup, Saints win.

Reggie Bush broke his right leg in the fourth quarter versus the 49ers and will be out 4-6 weeks. Yeesh, Reggie really did have a bad week. What’s next, finding out Paris Hilton has the hots for him?

While watching the Eagles fail at recovering an onside kick and giving Detroit some desperate hope, I noticed one funny thing. One of the Eagles on the field that failed to grab the bouncing ball was Hank Baskett, the onside kick goat for the Colts in last year’s Super Bowl. Unsurprising to me, the Eagles then released him this week. But no fear, apparently he’ll solve all the offensive wows in Minnesota as he promptly found a job with the Vikings. I’m sure Brett will love that.

Everyone's peeing themselves over LaDainian Tomlinson's big day, running for 138 yards on 22 carries. Yes, it was a great day for the new LT, but I warn you now. Just wait until December, and then we'll see how young his legs look running in snow and the freezing cold, two things he is very unaccustomed to dealing with during the football season

The Steel Pit

Steelers 19 – Titans 11

Thanks to a scintillating performance by the defense, Pittsburgh triumphed, put themselves in the driver’s seat in the division, and made life a bit easier until Roethlisberger’s return.

This one was wild from the opening kickoff, returned by rookie Antonio Brown for a touchdown, followed immediately by Tennessee’s first turnover and then by a donnybrook on the field where it appeared the entire Titan defense was looking to tear off a piece of Hines Ward’s head.

And despite some late game heroics by Kerry Collins in relief and a devastatingly effective onside kick, Tennessee failed in their ability to move the ball, close the scoring gap, take advantage of a Pittsburgh offense hampered by an ineffective offensive line decimated by heat and injury and poor quarterbacking, or even so much as get Chris Johnson lose in the Steeler secondary.

But each victory seems to come at a bigger cost, this time the team lost Dennis Dixon to injury. I even noted during the game that with Dixon’s erratic play, before you know it Charlie Batch would be the starter. Funny how prophetic that turned out to be.

But despite Charlie’s relief appearance and the too exciting conclusion, the team persevered and the defense played another gem to fill the breach left by Roethlisberger’s absence and a terribly ineffective offense.

Now, I must apologize to the defense. I felt that at best the Steelers would go 2-2 in Big Douche’s absence and that would be satisfactory. This was not an insult to the defense or even special teams, but just lowered expectations for the offense. And considering how with Dixon and Batch, the team managed 127 yards of total offense, I was not wrong with my poor outlook for the team’s fortunes. But neither did I anticipate how stunningly brutal and effective the defense would perform, and for that, I thank them and apologizing for not expecting, well, their brilliance. Good job guys, it feels like 2008 all over again.

Only In Faux NFL Reality…

Bronco receiver Kenny McKinley was found dead in his apartment of an apparent suicide. Our condolences go out to his family and the Bronco organization. Here’s hoping they find some peace and understanding in the face of this devastating situation.

In working to keep up with Braylon Edwards, Ravens offensive line coach Andy Moeller was arrested for drunk driving. What is with these idiots going boozing and cruising? Yeesh, I think MADD and SADD need to add seminars in NFL team offices in addition to the good work they already perform.

Andy Reid did a stunning about face and booted golden boy Kevin Kolb from the starting lineup in favor of the red hot Michael Vick. While this has the makings of being the redemption story I wanted from the beginning, and had to vehemently defend, I still wonder if somehow, this whole mess could have been avoided. Paging Donovan McNabb….

Steelers’ receiver Hines Ward was appointed to President Obama's Advisory Commission on Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders. Congratulations to Hines, the second Steeler to be appointed to a post in the current administration. I cannot wait for Casey “Big Snack” Hampton’s appointment to the committee for Health, Fitness and Nutrition.

In frustration, New York Giant tossed his helmet into the stands during a defeat at Indianapolis. Ok, yeah it was a stupid move and he acted childish and immature, plus his explanation of it caught on his fingers as he tried to throw it into the wall lacked any credibility. But come on NFL, the fan that caught it should have been able to keep it. I say baseball rules apply. If it leaves the field of play, it’s yours.

San Diego’s 48 game home sellout streak ended Sunday with a local blackout. I’m not surprised. Considering how fast Charger fans sell those tickets to opposing fans, they probably figured there’s no way all 400 Jaguar fans would show up.

To beat the heat and potential dehydration, Steelers tackle Max Starks plans to employ a solution Sunday taught to him by his grandmother, drink pickle juice. While the benefits of such a solution are widely debated for their actual worth, at least it’s the kind of pickled I prefer to see my NFL players. Yes, Braylon, I’m busting your chops yet again you idiot.

Upon Further Review

There is an adage universal to all sports, speed kills. But after watching last week, I think NFL teams should pay attention to one that applies more directly to their sport, turnovers kill. Here are a few of the most egregious examples that changed the course, and ultimately determined the victor, of certain games.

Tennessee turned the ball over seven times, six on offense and once on special teams. They held the ball at the end of the game with a chance to tie the score, but ultimately fell 19-11. Given that Pittsburgh only generated a total of 127 yards of offense, if Tennessee eliminates even one turnover, the ending could have been drastically different.

Dallas found themselves down 27-17 in the 4th quarter, but still had 4:40 left to play and holding 2 timeouts plus the two minute warning. Plenty of time to stage a comeback. Unfortunately Roy Williams fumbled the ball after a catch; the Bears recovered and ended the game.

The 49ers were at home jazzed up facing the Super Bowl champions on Jerry Rice’s night to be inducted into the team’s hall of fame. Despite a thrilling drive late in the game that tied the score, they ended up losing on a last second field goal. Without just one of their four turnovers, perhaps their late game heroics would have been unnecessary and the victory theirs.

Minnesota turned the ball over four times, including once in their own end zone when Brett Favre was stripped of the ball and Miami covered for a touchdown. That score proved to be the winning margin in a 14-10 defeat.

The Ravens lost to Cincinnati 15-10, in large part to the fact Baltimore quarterback Joe Flacco threw 4 interceptions, killing potential scoring drives. Even if only two of those drives went for scores and ended in field goals, that’s a final score of 16-15 and victory.

Ball security is something they teach in Pop Warner and stress vigorously in every level of football up. Why oh why is it so hard for those who get paid to play to remember this basic fundamental that can so drastically affect the outcome of one game, and perhaps a season?

He Said He Said

"We're a little bit annoyed (about) the premature reporting of our death. We're pleased that we're 2-0, but we're not astounded by it. We expect to win.” – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin

Hmmm, sounds like Mike’s a bit pissed about how others have perceived his team.


“The NFL will have to pry my cold, dead hands off postgame locker-room access.” – SI.com’s Peter King addressing voiced opinions that locker room access should be eliminated altogether

Don’t hold back Peter; tell us how you really feel about it.


"There were six points given off [bad] calls. Its six points. They didn't earn it. You don't come into a lion's den and play nice, man. This is football, and football is getting hit. There's so many rules that take away from the game." – Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis after Baltimore's 15-10 loss to Cincinnati

Yes Ray Ray, it was the official’s entire fault you lost. Never mind your quarterback threw 4 interceptions. Nope, that had nothing to do with it. It was the official’s penalty calls on your defense.


"We just sucked.'' - Patriots quarterback Tom Brady after their loss to the Jets.

No kidding.


"We will not try to stop Drew Brees. We will stop Drew Brees. Next question.'' - 49ers head coach Mike Singletary in a local San Francisco media interview

So close…


“Vince Young had an alarming regression Sunday” – SI.com’s Peter King

Well that will happen when you have the Steelers defense pounding and mugging you for three quarters.


"Stranger things have happened, particularly with us recently." – Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin talking about Pittsburgh’s quarterback situation

When I realized that during the Titans game Pittsburgh’s top two quarterbacks on the depth chart were both at home watching the game, I’d say yeah, stranger things have happened.


"I came back to give this team a chance to win, to be a part of it." – Vikings quarterback Brett Favre

Good job so far, Brett.

Idiot of the week

This week’s award goes to the receiver with Roberto Duran’s hands of stone, Jets receiver Braylon Edwards.

Edwards had a great shot at winning for his infantile taunting after catching a touchdown during the Jets/Patriots contest. Considering how many times Braylon drops the ball normally, he led the league last year, you’d think he’d spend more time being thankful he managed to hold onto the ball. But Edwards pushed his nomination to a runaway victory by getting arrested early Tuesday morning for driving while intoxicated, being drunk twice the legal limit while having three others in the car with him, two of them being teammates. Was the victory over the Patriots that big that he needed to be celebrating until the wee hours two days later?

And come on drunk driving? Very little that people can do anger me more than drunk driving, mainly because in our world of multiple forms of public and private transportation options, there is no need. Take a bus, a cab, rent a limo, call a friend. Heck the Jets have a program for their players that if they find themselves out and in need of a ride, they can call the team! And have we not learned yet as a society to never, ever get behind the wheel of a vehicle while intoxicated? Come on people. What makes me even madder, so far no suspension by the league, and Edwards will be playing on Sunday. Great message you're sending there, Goodell.

So for being a questionable receiver to begin with, working harder at being a celebrity than a quality football player, drunk driving, drunk driving in a city where there are always cabs available, endangering others as well as teammates and doing it all while rocking a bizarre Grizzly Adams beard, Braylon you are an idiot.

On Tap This Week

Look, I learned from my previous week’s errors!

Last week: 10 - 6
Season to date: 18 - 14

That’s a bit better, but still not good enough. How about we go for another two game, or perhaps more, improvement.


Sunday

Cleveland (0-2) at Baltimore (1-1)

No fear Drew Carey, Seneca Wallace will save the day! Oh, right, no he won’t.

Ravens over Browns

Cincinnati (1-1) at Carolina (0-2)

John Fox’s gamble with Matt Moore seems to be backfiring horribly. Perhaps he can call Andy Reid and ask if he has a Vick to spare.

Bengals over Panthers

Dallas (0-2) at Houston (2-0)

Houston’s gritty comeback overtime win told me everything I need to know about them. Dallas crapping the bed again against a team they should have beaten did the same thing.

Texans over Cowboys

San Francisco (0-2) at Kansas City (2-0)

Now that was the San Francisco team I expected in week 1. But a heartbreaking loss tends to lead to big let downs the next week. But I’m still not convinced Kansas City is anything special, well until they unleash Jamaal Charles.

Chiefs over 49ers

Detroit (0-2) at Minnesota (0-2)

Oh, I am so tempted to take Detroit. I really really want to just jump in with both feet. But without Matt Stafford, let’s just say I’m keeping some semblance of restraint.

Vikings over Lions

Buffalo (0-2) at New England (1-1)

Ok, yes the Pats pooed the bed last week. But Buffalo is already in panic mode, switching quarterbacks to Ryan Fitzpatrick. Yeah, that’ll fix everything.

Patriots over Bills

Atlanta (1-1) at New Orleans (2-0)

Atlanta is a good team. But New Orleans showed last week that champions find a way to win no matter the circumstances.

Saints over Falcons

Tennessee (1-1) at New York Giants (1-1)

Did Pittsburgh break Vince Young for the season? We’ll find out today. I know New York is at home, but I just get a feeling Chris Johnson is going to be pissed off.

Titans over Giants

Pittsburgh (2-0) at Tampa Bay (2-0)

Really? This game matches undefeated teams? Who saw this coming? And to think, I figured this would be such a cake walk, I’ll be at a baseball game instead of watching. What was I thinking?

Steelers over Buccaneers

Philadelphia (1-1) at Jacksonville (1-1)

Let the Michael Vick era begin! Soon to come, the Kevin Kolb era, followed closely by the Andy Reid is an idiot era. Oh wait, that last one started years ago.

Eagles over Jaguars

Washington (1-1) at St. Louis (0-2)

I do like Sam Bradford and how he has the Rams playing. But hey, McNabb’s still got it.

Redskins over Rams

Oakland (1-1) at Arizona (1-1)

Let’s play who has the worst starting quarterback! That’s the real hard pick here.

Cardinals over Raiders

Indianapolis (1-1) at Denver (1-1)

I loved what Denver did last week, showing glimpses of brilliance. But the team is reeling from the loss of one of their own. And no matter how hard you try to put those things behind you, they always make for an emotional week. Sometimes a team can channel that emotion into a tough win, and I’d give them points for that and the benefit of the doubt. But not against Peyton Manning.

Colts over Broncos

San Diego (1-1) at Seattle (1-1)

This is my litmus test for Seattle. They win, and then there might be hope. They lose, and then they are as bad as I thought they would be. Your move, USC boy. And no, after week 1, I cannot trust San Diego on the road in a loud, hostile environment with Norv Turner involved.

Seahawks over Chargers

New York Jets (1-1) at Miami (2-0)

Which Mark Sanchez will show up this week? I think it’s going to be the one who wilts in front of a blistering defensive pressure.

Dolphins over Jets

Monday

Green Bay (2-0) at Chicago (2-0)

Let’s see, Chicago has a porous offensive line, and Green Bay's Clay Matthews has 6 sacks in 2 games. I wonder how low Jay Cutler’s head will bow by halftime.

Packers over Bears