The Crystal Ball 2008 Week 7

Welcome one and all to Week 7 of the 2008 NFL Season! The Lady K and I are almost complete with our treatment for DFS, the full story to come next week before the big Steelers/Giants showdown. But just like teams do not like to look ahead on the schedule, neither do I. So before I give anything away….


Opening Kickoff

Through six weeks, the NFL landscape is being dominated by seasoned quarterbacks. Gus Frerotte, Jeff Garcia, Brett Favre, Kurt Warner and the undefeated Kerry Collins have all taken time as leaders of their offenses. Quite possibly octogenarian Brad Johnson could join their ranks. Now we know why Daunte Culpepper retired, he’s just too young. Vinnie Testaverde, come on down, you could be the next contestant on The Quarterback Is Ripe.


Recap

Hmmm, Neck Beard, why must you tempt and tease me? Did I believe too strongly, or forget to account for karma finally giving suffering Falcon fans a reason to smile?

Remember what I said about the Redskins being the secret beast of the NFC East? Yeah, never mind that. For that matter, can you really buy the argument that the NFC East is the best conference? Not when three of the 4 teams in the division lose to the Rams, Cardinals and Browns.

A cookie goes to Pete Kendall making a heads up play grabbing Jason Campbell’s defected pass. But said cookie is revoked for Kendall attempting to run with it, then subsequently fumbling and leading to a Rams touchdown. And that’s why big guys are typically linemen.

I’m not sure who played a sloppier game in Phoenix, the Cardinals, the Cowboys or the officials. All of them were terrible. I mean, come on Morelli, what was with the conference at the end of the game trying to figure out the penalty? And people gave Big Ed static.

Nick Folk should just walk around from now on calling himself the Iceman. He nailed that kick to propel the Cowboys into overtime after being iced twice. Once by the Cardinals, and once by the referees who decided at the last second to do an “official review” of the already nonsensical previous play.

See kids, that’s why Whiz has spent much time building the Cards into Steelers West, to get that kind of play from players like Sean Morey.

Finally something good about baseball! Thanks to the playoffs Joe Buck was off playing NLCS announcer while Dick Stockton filled his spot in the NFL booth with Troy. Oh, the game was so enjoyable to listen to, not only because Stockton knows his stuff, but Troy didn’t have to dumb down his color commentary. Why can’t we have that every week?

In San Diego during the 3rd quarter after a failed Patriot 4th down attempt at a touchdown, the camera showed Bill Belichick. He had a look I haven’t seen on his face since he coached Cleveland. The “I don’t know what else to do” face.

Oh the poor Patriots, having players drop left and right all night long. I’d feel bad, but….

I’ll give the Pats this bit of advice. Never, ever, under any circumstances, pick up discarded Bungles again. I know Deltha O’Neal seemed like a good idea at the time, but I’m sure now you realize why he was cut. And if he’s not good enough for the ultra crappy Bungles, how could he be good enough for you?

Tom Terrific had two surgeries on his damaged knee, hey just like Peyton! One to repair the damage and one to get rid of an infection. Oh, come on Tom, we know you’re just jealous of Peyton who had two knee surgeries and still started in week 1. It’s ok. I think Brett is jealous too.

I wish I could get a good bead on which Charger team would show up from week to week. The one that looks lackluster and gets creamed as they did in Miami or the juggernaut that steamrolls opponents like the one that took the field against New England. If Norv could give me a signal, it would really help my picks.

For that matter, I’d like some more consistency out of some other Jekyll and Hyde teams, namely Miami, Washington, Denver and Chicago. Just let me know when you’re ebbing into crappiness before each Sunday, and we’ll be cool.

By the way, what was Jay Cutler wearing in his postgame interview, David Byrne’s old coat? And seriously, can’t someone chip in $9.95 and get him a better hair cut? He’s a starting QB for Pete’s sake, not a kicker.

Hey, there’s the Colts! I guess they hadn’t got them all unpacked from the old stadium yet.

Two big things that I noted from the Browns/Giants mess: First I ask of the Browns, how do you commit a false start at home? Six times???

Second, to the Giants, what kind of hurry up offense was that? I know things looked beyond bleak at that point, but at least try. Eli, where did you learn how to drive the team that fast, from Donavan McNabb?

The Browns may or may not have saved their season; that has yet to be determined. But Derek Anderson sure saved his job for a few weeks.

Amazing stats, the Giants had no sacks, no forced turnovers and no opponent punts.

Eli Manning suffered this week from a bruised chest sustained in the game. Which begs the question, with referees and the NFL frightened to death about injuring their marquee quarterbacks and supposedly cracking down on quarterback hits, why the hell has no referee called a roughing the passer penalty on Shaun Rogers? This is the second quarterback I’ve watched him drill and drive into the ground long after the pass was thrown. James Harrison hits a quarterback as the ball is released and let’s up on the tackle, gets penalized and fined. Rogers nails both Roethlisberger and Manning well after the ball is gone and drives both into the turf and nothing happens. Hell, there was an official standing RIGHT THERE when he did it to Eli. Really Goodell? How about some damned consistency here. And you think full time refs would be bad.

The best part of the game though came in at the end, when Tony “please I desperately need a hair intervention” Kornheiser kept harping at Tirico and Jaws about calling out the Giants and their poor time management. Jaws had brought it up, but Kornheiser kept needling him. For a moment, I could have sworn Jaws would take a swing at him. I wouldn’t have objected.


The Steel Pit

With a week off, the Steel Pit has been fairly quiet. But there have been a few things that have kept things interesting.

Team chairman Dan Rooney is opposed to a longer NFL season. Owners have been discussing adding one or two games to the current schedule and pairing down the preseason games accordingly. Rooney is opposed to adding to the schedule, but willing to go to one additional game if the other owners are interested in expanding the season.

Despite a week of rest and healing, several key players are still not ready to go. Casey Hampton practiced lightly, but is expected to sit out another week. Left tackle Marvel Smith sat out all week due to back spasms, and will be replaced by Max Starks on Sunday. Now you know why he was slapped with the transition tag. Jeff Reed should be healed enough from his calf injury for field goals and extra points, but Mitch Berger may be handling kickoff duties as well as punting. Not bad for a guy who didn’t have a team for most of August. And with receiver Dallas Baker still nursing an injury, rookie Limas Sweed will finally get an opportunity to play.

But the weirdest injury related story easily belongs to Willie Parker and the holy field. Parker was healing nicely and looked to be ready to play, until he stepped into a hole in the practice field and tweaked his healing knee. Now Parker will play spectator again while Mewelde Moore continues his impressive relief work.

The best story out of the Burgh this week though came from usually soft spoken Troy Polamalu. Polamalu felt the need to share his opinion regarding the current state of the NFL in the wake of increasing fines on players for hits or contact that is not penalized during games. I’ll let Troy’s words speak for themselves.

"It's becoming more and more flag football, two-hand touch. We've really lost the essence of what real American football is about. They're not really concerned about safety, because people have been doing this for ... quite a few decades. You've got to figure out how to tackle people a new way. ... It's too much."

Polamalu continued on, speaking of such former NFL greats as Dick Butkus, Jack Lambert, Mean Joe Greene, Ronnie Lott and Jack Tatum.

"These guys really went after people. They were that way because the game was physical. Now, they couldn't survive in this type of game. They wouldn't have enough money. They'd be paying fines all the time, and then they'd be suspended for the year after they do it two games in a row. It's kind of ridiculous."

"It's just the essence of what NFL football is. You don't want to get into a sport that loses the core mentality. It's like playing basketball and, 'Oh, you can't body somebody up. You can't touch them. You can only play defense from a foot out.' It takes away from the real athleticism of the sport. ... football loses its identity. I didn't mean being cheap, but (those who) don't take anything from anybody. Know what I mean? Joe Greene wouldn't take anything from anybody. Joey Porter wouldn't. When people came to our field, they knew this was our home field. Nobody was going to mess with us. ... That's the type of attitude I think is really awesome."

Hear hear Troy! Hines Ward, who has drawn such fines recently, said he will not change his style of play. Coach Mike Tomlin has said to Ward to continue doing what he does best. Support and agreement even came from Bungle WR Chad Ocho Cinco (even if no one else calls him by his legal name, I will!) who stated:

"Unnecessary roughness? That doesn't make any sense. I am serious; that doesn't make any sense at all. Hines has always been probably the best darned blocker in the NFL. I don't understand where you get unnecessary roughness from. That is not even a rule."

Polamalu usually does his talking on the field, but when he does let his quiet demeanor down he shows a thoughtful and intelligent mind. I’d say we need to get this guy speaking more often, but I’m sure he’ll get fined for these comments. Why keep racking up bills?

In response, commissioner Goodell shot back at Polamalu’s comments on Baltimore radio.

"I have a great deal of respect for him as a player, and obviously he has a right to his own views. But to say that this is about money and not the health of our players, I think is extremely disappointing when we spend as much time as we do with active players, reviewing our rules, reviewing techniques and making sure we make the game is as safe as possible."

Goodell, I’d believe your statements over Polamalu’s if I ever saw any consistency in the penalties called. See Shawn Rogers.


NFL The Alternative Universe

Jerry Jones, boy he’s showing up a bunch lately, trotted out the Jonas Brothers before the game against the Cardinals to pimp their performance at Texas Stadium during halftime of the Cowboys Thanksgiving game. Really, the Jonas Brothers? I know the Janet Jackson boob fiasco was too saucy for the NFL, but must we have these constant milquetoast acts during big time NFL games? And as for keeping in touch with his core audience, do you really think Jonas Brothers fans are hunkered down each Sunday watching football or instead updating their Facebook pages and texting Brittany about what Dakota did with Trevor last weekend! Hmmmm, I’m guessing the latter.

Former Jaguars defensive lineman Richard Collier was released from the hospital this week. As I mentioned last week, if ever you felt the need to pray for an NFL player, pray for Collier.

Denver Police brought murder charges against a man in the shooting death of Bronco cornerback Darrent Williams. Can’t we just put him in a room with a few of Darrent’s former teammates, quietly lock the door and take a long coffee break? I have no problem with this.

Ex NFL running back Travis Henry was released from jail on bail. Henry is charged with federal drug charges and posted $400,000 in bail for his release. Good gravy, how will the man support his children forking over that kind of scratch?

Jaguars receiver Matt Jones was notified his cocaine charge will be heard in drug court in Fayetteville Arkansas instead of the regular criminal system, helping him avoid a mark on his record even if found guilty. Huh, I wonder how he swung that sweet deal, sport celebrity or the color of his skin. I’ll let you decide that one.

Perpetual douche bag and Kansas City running back Larry Johnson was charged with shoving a woman in a nightclub in KC back in February. This marks Johnson’s third time being charged with assault on a woman. I’ve said this before, but it needs said again. Johnson, what’s with this ridiculous thug act, YOU GREW UP IN STATE COLLEGE PENNSYLVANIA! Did this bucolic past create an asinine need to act like a total jackass now in adult life in order to create some ridiculous street cred?

Recently unemployed running back Shawn Alexander signed this week with the Redskins as insurance due to injury to Ladell Betts. I wonder if he will sit in the Redskins cafeteria and exchange Super Bowl XL stories with Antwaan Randle El?

Speaking of former Steelers, Dolphins linebacker Joey Porter was fined $20,000 by the NFL for making critical comments regarding Ed Hochuli pertaining to the Dolphins loss at Houston. Oh, now THERE’S a fight I’d watch, Porter versus Hochuli. You want to invigorate the boxing world? Get these two in the ring, with Mills Lane as referee. Let’s get it on!!!


Upon Further Review

The toll of the Cardinal game on the Cowboys was much more than an overtime loss and a tie in their division. Their initial early season dominance has been crushed and now the seams are unraveling in big D. I haven’t seen this much drama since Larry Hagman sported a 10 gallon hat.

First off, there’s the ongoing Adam Jones saga. Jones was suspended indefinitely by the league for fighting with his team assigned bodyguard, misidentified by me as a hotel employee last week, in an alcohol related incident. Thursday Jones entered an alcohol treatment program in an attempt to save face. He can ask for reinstatement after 4 games, but Goodell said a lifetime ban is possible.

Tony Romo could be out 4 weeks with broken pinkie on throwing hand. But after talking with BRETT FAVRE, Romo wants to play and even practiced. Wow, Favre healed him enough just over the phone to play. Is there anything Brett can’t do?

Punter Mat McBriar is out for season with broken kicking foot suffered on the last play of the Cardinals game.

Uber rookie Felix Jones is out 2-4 weeks with a partially torn hamstring. Wait, I just realized something, there are a bunch of guys named Jones on the team. Hmmmm, I wonder if it’s a sinister plan by the head Jones to have a team of Jones’ and change the name of the team from Cowboys to Jones. But I digress…

Defensive back Terence Newman out with injury further depleting a weakened secondary.

TO continues his campaign to alienate even Jerry Jones. This time, he spent time on the sidelines harping at center Andre Gurode. Not nearly as entertaining as the time he did it to McNabb and kinda played out. What’s next, crunches in the parking lot?

This game is my proof of my earlier observation that the Cowboys are a sloppy, lazy and undisciplined team that lacks serious fundamentals. And it’s every player from the top down. If Romo had better fundamentals, he wouldn’t get stripped so often. If TO had better fundamentals, he’d shut up and run his routes. If the defensive backfield had better fundamentals, they’d defend a pass once in a while. If Wade Phillips had better fundamentals, he’d look like coach and not a retired man on vacation who won the resort karaoke contest with a stirring rendition of “Only You”. And if Jerry Jones had better fundamentals, he’d have never fought with Jimmy Johnson.

So with his team momentarily reeling and suffering from significant holes in their secondary, running and return game special teams and at quarterback and people calling out his tendency to take on hard luck cases and sweep serious transgressions under the rug, Jerry Jones springs into action. And what does the all knowing head Jones do to fortify his team? He picks up Lions WR Roy Williams for a king’s ransom. Good call Jerry, that’ll fix things.

Wait, it already has. With the addition of Williams now Owens, oblivious of the fact that Williams was brought in to help stretch the field and pull double coverage off of TO, ups his complaining to the media of how he’s frustrated about how much of the ball he’s getting.

Jones has had success in the past managing players with strong personalities and gigantic egos while keeping the mayhem under control and under the rug. But this time, he might have too much to handle at once. With his business side distracted by the raising of his football cathedral, his attention is momentarily divided. Plus he’s stocked his roster with more egos than Freud’s case study library and all of them are beginning to clash at once. And the team is currently run by the amiable Wade Phillips, who could not control a kindergarten class let alone the soccer riot that is the Cowboys locker room. All of these are combining to form the perfect storm of madness that could turn the pre season Super Bowl favorite from the NFC into the odd man out in the NFC East. Works for me, then we’d have a great team in the Super Bust. Go Jerry!


Football 101

Watching some of the action last week, I figured it high time we take a look at one of the more fundamental items of playing football, proper tackling.

From the first drills in August mini camps all across the nation from Pee Wee leagues to the Pros, one of the most important tenants all defensive coaches pound into their charges heads is that when tackling, you wrap your arms around the ball carrier. No matter if it be a running back, receiver, quarterback or a lineman picking up a loose ball, when you lay your shoulder into the carrier to make the tackle, you wrap your arms around them and do not let go until the whistle sounds. This action is one of the most essential pieces of good tackling. When you wrap your arms, you attach yourself to the ball carrier keeping them from getting loose and making a big play. When following this edict, the worst that can happen is the carrier gets a few extra yards, no more.

But watching a few teams last weekend showed me this most fundamental piece of defensive skill is sorely under coached. The Chargers, Broncos, Cowboys and Ravens demonstrated horrible tackling skills against their opponents. Defensive backs would fly in to make a play, hit the ball carrier and bounce off because none of them wrapped their arms. Linebackers had similar track records, looking to make highlight films with a spectacular hit rather than helping their team with solid fundamentals.

And what did this improper tackling provide for their respective fates? The Broncos, Cowboys and Ravens all lost their matches, some spectacularly. The Chargers did manage to win, but it was more because of the quality of their opponent than their acumen as tacklers. But let’s dive in deeper and take a look at each team's records and defensive standings.

Ravens – 2-3 1st in total defense – ouch that hurts the theory, but let’s consider the fact that the Ravens are also on a 3 game losing streak and were blown out by a previously thought left for dead Colts team.

Cowboys – 4-2 10th in total defense – that doesn’t help much either, but the Cowboys have lost 2 of their last three games and are currently reeling.

Chargers – 3-3 28th in total defense – do you see a pattern start to form?

Broncos – 4-2 30th in total defense – if it were not for their prolific offense, Denver would be in far worse shape.

While looking at these teams it may seem I am overreacting as their records are not horrible, but I do not believe I am. Wrapping your arms when you make a tackle is a fundamental part of football taught at the earliest levels of the game through the highest level. If a team is unable to handle even this most basic of skills, there is no way they will succeed with more intricate schemes and never will they capture the ultimate prize, an NFL championship. No team that performs this way will make, or win, the Super Bowl, and I predict now none of these 4 teams will this year. Watch all teams if you have a chance and closely watch their defense. If the 11 gentlemen they field are showing poor tackling fundamentals, that team will go nowhere come January.


He Said He Said

This fun little idea came to me after hearing just one too many nonsensical comments from the mouths of the NFL elite. So I figure why not lay out some of the best from the week. It’s a test show, and could be pulled after only a few weeks if it doesn’t find its legs. But why not give it a trial run. Such a shame Denny Green doesn’t coach anymore, that would help ratings.

Jon Kitna is convinced Detroit has used his back injury and subsequent trip to injured reserve as an excuse to bench him. Yes John, there is animosity there, but I have trouble buying Detroit would prefer their current options over you especially after watching the “highlights” of their tilt with the Vikings.

85 feels his lack of catches is punishment for speaking out in the summer. No Chad, it’s because Carson Palmer is a shell of his former self, Ryan Fitzpatrick is no gunslinger and he does not know who C. Johnson is. FREE OCHO CINCO.

Vince Young has decided to use all of the negativity against him as motivation, is unsure why the media is writing stories on him with such negativity and believes they are writing his legacy. No Vince, you write your own legacy. And so far you’re writing very poorly.

Coming out of commercial break during Sunday Night Football, the staff showed another local restaurant preparing a delicacy. At the end of the spot, it showed a couple digging in and the table featured a gargantuan drink with two straws. Madden of course could not hold back and stated that he would not need a straw and would just drink straight from the glass, it didn’t matter what it contained. It’s going to be a dull game this Sunday night without John.


Idiot of the week

Oh, once again the nominees came fast and furious. So many people making great cases to win this coveted award, but one stood above the rest.

This week we bestow the title of Idiot upon Jerry Jones. Yes, continuing to attempt to placate the consistently unsatisfied TO qualifies him. As does spending a billion dollars on a football stadium, constantly fighting with the NFL about nonsensical things such as beverage licensing, becoming a halfway house for the NFL troubled and continuing to hire coaches whom he can control instead of ones that might get the job done (careful here, look how well it’s been working out for Al Davis.)

But what seals the deal this week is his no big deal approach to the latest Adam “I should go back to Pacman” Jones transgression. Yes Jerry, his talent is enough to take a chance on, but the man has serious issues that need real help, not the band aid of being able to play football and certainly not the enabling attitude put forth by you. So for overlooking the issues of a young man on a self destructive path merely to get press and some on field production; Jerry you are an Idiot.


Taking the Week Off

Cardinals - What’s there to do this week? They’re 4-2, knocked off the Cowboys and feeling pretty good about themselves. It’s Miller Time!

Jaguars – Regrouping, recovering, remembering and reacquainting.

Falcons – See the Cardinals entry above.

Eagles – Eagle fans will stop their usual ponderings regarding Andy Reid’s foolish game decisions and poor clock management and McNabb’s penchant for choking in big games to watch the Phillies in the World Series. While I fancy western PA sporting teams, I’ll always support the eastern teams. Go Phillies!

John Madden – Madden is sitting out this Sunday’s game in order to avoid traveling across the country three weeks in a row. It will be his first missed game in 476 broadcasts. Personally, I think John just wanted to avoid having to find something interesting to say about the imploding Seahawks.


On Tap This Week

The football gods give when they feel kind, and take when they feel slighted. I guess my hubris about the 12-2 week was not looked upon kindly.

Last week 6-8
Season to date 54-34

Yeesh. Ok, another week another opportunity for teams to play above, and below, their heads and cream me.


Sunday


San Diego (3-3) at Buffalo (4-1)

Yes, San Diego’s demolition of the Pats in prime time looked impressive, but was it? I mean they beat Matt Cassel, not Tom Brady. And their traveling this week across the country and next across the ocean while Buffalo had a week off filled with rest and wings.

Bills over Chargers


New Orleans (3-3) at Carolina (4-2)

Wow, a tough one right near the start. In the NFC South I think home team wins. At least I hope so.

Panthers over Saints


Minnesota (3-3) at Chicago (3-3)

The Vikings squeezed out a win thanks to Bungles-level play from the Lions. Only bad strategy last week killed Chicago. I bet they kick deep this week if it’s close.

Bears over Vikings


Pittsburgh (4-1) at Cincinnati (0-6)

As if this one would be difficult to pick before, Carson Palmer is out again with elbow trouble. Who knows how far this Bungle ship will sink.

Steelers over Bengals


Tennessee (5-0) at Kansas City (1-4)

Larry Johnson is suspended for violating team rules. Nope, has nothing to do with his new legal troubles. Wow, that Herm Edwards hiring sure was a good call. Herm, you should have stayed in New York, you’re reputation might look a slight bit better today.

Titans over Chiefs


Baltimore (2-3) at Miami (2-3)

I’m not overly impressed by either team. But Miami did keep it close last week, more than I can say from Ray Lewis and Company.

Dolphins over Ravens


San Francisco (2-4) at New York Giants (4-1)

Yes, the New York defense looked mortal last week. What San Fran fans wouldn’t give to have a week when looking mortal was considered an off week.

Giants over 49ers


Dallas (4-2) at St. Louis (1-4)

Despite being nothing but a sheer mess, and with the Ram feeling their oats with a big giant win last week this looks to be a monster week for St. Louis. Eh, sounds too easy.

Cowboys over Rams


Detroit (0-5) at Houston (1-4)

Good gravy, who’s watching this travesty of football? This is why NFL players make so much, to put up with crap like this?

Texans over Lions


Indianapolis (3-2) at Green Bay (3-3)

Joseph Addai is out for 2-4 weeks with a partially torn hamstring, so back to the future Dominic Rhodes is the man again in Indy. If Marvin Harrison is really back, it will matter not. I’m taking my first real chance this week on Indianapolis.

Colts over Packers


New York Jets (3-2) at Oakland (1-4)

Just when you thought things could not get any worse in Oakland, welcome to the Tom Cable show! I wonder if the NFL could intervene here regarding Al Davis, like a family letting grandpa know he should no longer be driving. Nah, what fun would that be?

Jets over Raiders


Cleveland (2-3) at Washington (4-2)

I figured out how Washington works. One horrible game followed by 4 winning performances. Now, this should mean the start of a 4 game winning streak. Right?

Redskins over Browns


Seattle (1-4) at Tampa Bay (4-2)

I’m not falling for an upset here. Seattle does not travel to the East Coast well. Ok, lately they do not do much of anything well. And they really won’t with Hasselbeck out again.

Buccaneers over Seahawks


Monday

Denver (4-2) at New England (3-2)

If the Pats win, then Denver’s crappy defense is to blame and yet another Bronco defensive coordinator will be held up as a sacrificial lamb, even though the current coordinator is still working with Browns castoffs. If Denver wins, then we start hearing the real rumblings that the only way Belichick can win is with a healthy dose of Tom Brady and cheating. This might be the toughest one of the week. Yes, the Broncos offense is great, but their defense sucks. Yes Cassel sucks, but he’s ok against questionable defenses. The Broncos are the sexy pick, but if I learned anything from the ALCS game 5, it’s never count out an experienced Boston team. Hold on, I have to take a moment to deal with the bile rising up my esophagus. Ok, I’m good.

Patriots over Broncos